Nesheaholic.com

What I'm loving on my iPhone: Viggle and Hero Academy

2012-01-27T17:48:00.000-05:00

Two apps that I've recently downloaded have made me quite the happy iPhone user (as if I wasn't already). The first is the game Hero Academy. It trumps all of the GamesWithFriends that I play. It's a strategy based game that you play against actual people. It's a little like chess in that you have "pieces" that you have to split between offense and defense. Each type of character can move in different ways and has different powers just like chess. The animations are great, and it only takes a short time to get the hang of things. If you download it start a game with me! Username is Nesheaholic (of course)

The second app, which I just got Wednesday night when it came out is Viggle. It's basically an incentive based program that gives you rewards for watching TV. You "check in" to a show by letting the app "listen" to your tv and then you get points for how long you watch the show. Those points can then be redeemed for small gift cards from the likes of Starbucks and Amazon. I think it's pretty cool. Get rewards for watching tv... I love TV and I love rewards, so this is a match made in heaven.

The app is so innovative. It's the first app I know since Shazam that utilizes the iPhones "listening" ability. From a marketing standpoint it's genius. Encouraging people to share what they are watching for points, offering points for watching movie trailers, they've got a good system that is obviously of interest to advertisers since there are a lot of businesses signed up in the rewards program. You can also set easy reminders in your iPhone to watch shows through Viggle.

What smart phone apps are YOU loving right now?

Way Too Many GamesWithFriends

2012-01-21T09:00:00.000-05:00

Games are supposed to be fun right?

It all started with Words with Friends. It was such an exciting concept, playing a live scrabble game with a friend I actually knew. It was a great time passer, and I even got my mom playing. After Words with Friends came Hanging with Friends. This was also an exciting venture. It's like hangman, but I can play it with my friends from afar, how cool, right? Now, upon having Words with Friends and Hanging with friends both going, my iPhone notifications of games awaiting me to take my turn increased. I think I constantly had at least one game awaiting my attention. It almost became a chore. I don't like having unchecked notifications on my iPhone screen, and leaving them there was driving me crazy lol. THEN, this week, enter Scramble with Friends. I also love this game, but there are just too many games! I get more game notifications on my phone than I do texts or calls lol. On top of the "with friends" games I'm also playing Hero Academy. What am I to do with all these games?! lol

My username on all the games are Nesheaholic, if you play and want to challenge me ;-)

Blogger Spotlight: Cami of "First Day of My Life"

2012-01-20T08:30:00.000-05:00

Hooray for my third edition of the Blogger Spotlight Series! Today, I introduce you to Cami of First Day of My Life. Christian and proud of it, Cami has a blog similar to mine, a compilation of likes, dislikes, and daily occurrences. She also keeps up with blog series' like Tasty Tuesdays and Wordless Wednesdays. If you are looking for some freelance design or social media work for your company, organization or website, she does that too!

How long have you been blogging?
I started blogging summer of 2011 for First Day of My Life. I've been blogging for Baby Pickel's blog since May of 2010. (Baby Pickel helps single moms/families in need.)

What made you start a blog?

I always enjoyed blogging for Baby Pickel. What I blogged about for Baby Pickel had to do with the families we were helping, ways God showed Himself to me, inspiration, motivation, etc. I enjoyed (and still enjoy!) it but wanted to start getting a little more personal - so I started First Day of My Life.

What was your vision when you first started blogging and how has that changed over time?

My vision for blogging is to have a place to go to as a creative outlet, to connect with other bloggers, and really shine the light of Jesus to my readers.

You seem to have a nice blog following, what do you think contributes to that?

I visit those people's blogs that visit mine and leave me comments...I respond to comments. I try to build a relationship with my readers - I think that shows them that I care about them as a person (which I do!)

What advice do you have for the aspiring blogger?

Be real. Just like anything else - have fun. Don't try to be like someone else because they have a bunch of followers - just be yourself. Most importantly, don't write for anyone but yourself.

Where on the internet outside of your blog can you be found?

Twitter / GooglePlus / eTsy / Pinterest

My Thoughts on the SOPA/PIPA Internet Shutdown

2012-01-19T08:30:00.000-05:00

First off, if you haven’t been keeping up with the events leading up to yesterday’s Internet Shutdown and what SOPA and PIPA are all about there is a FAQ below.

Now, my thoughts:

The whole movement kind of made me excited. I was excited to see a demonstration like I saw. Various websites (Reddit, Tumblr, Google, Wikipedia, etc.) allowed internet users to really get a piece of what our online lives could be like if bills like SOPA and PIPA passed. You go to look for/at something... and it’s just not there. Censored, blacked out, at the whim of companies or the government. I think we entirely take the freedom of the internet for granted. That freedom is threatened by SOPA and PIPA.

The first place I came across some anti-SOPA/PIPA action was Flickr. They gave users the option to black-out their hosted photos for the day.

I also appreciated Tumblrs contribution. They gave users an option to black-out their Tumblr blogs for the day. So yesterday, if you happened to visit my tumblr you saw this:

And there was Wikipedia, who blacked out their site for the day, and Google, who censored their logo.

Who was I disappointed with? Facebook and Twitter. I’m not saying they needed to shut down. I think they played an important part in getting the word out about action steps against SOPA and PIPA. But I feel like they could have done SOMETHING. Give users an easy option to black out their profile photos, have a SOPA pop-up box or something. How dare you be two of the largest social networking sites on the internet and not do something to take a stand for internet freedom?

FAQ (re-posted from Reddit.com’s black-out page)

What is the intent of SOPA/PROTECT IP?

The stated intent of the bills is to provide tools for law enforcement and copyright holders to protect their intellectual property rights.

What’s wrong with protecting copyrights?

Nothing! The devil, as they say, is in the details. PROTECT IP and SOPA will cause too much collateral damage, have a high potential for abuse, and won't even be that effective at stopping the crimes they target. Read alienth's examination of where these bills fail.

What are the differences between PROTECT IP and SOPA?

At a general level, the bills are very similar. SOPA, the "Stop Online Piracy Act," is from the House of Representatives, while the PROTECT IP Act is from the Senate. Either or both bills may pass a vote in their chamber of congress on their way to becoming law. Both must be defeated to end this threat. There have recently been more detailed explanations in an ELI5 thread and alienth's blog post.

More answers
Check out the /r/SOPA Community FAQ.

Learn more

Read alienth's blog post on why these acts are bad for business
Information on H.R.3261 – Stop Online Piracy Act at OpenCongress.org
Information on S.968 – PROTECT IP Act at OpenCongress.org
SOPAOpera.org keeps track of where your congressmembers stand

Get Involved

Outside the US? Find out what's wrong with ACTA and do something about it. Email the US state department about PIPA and SOPA via Stop American Censorship
Look up and contact your representative via the EFF
Helpful info from a redditor on making phone calls to your senator or representative
Complete the Take Action Checklist at Stop American Censorship

Funerals = Luxury + Tradition

2012-01-18T11:58:00.000-05:00

The whole process of funerals is steeped in tradition. Funerals are expensive, and are pretty much luxury purchases. Of course, going to a funeral is NOT a luxury, but the money spent isn’t necessarily needed. The concept of “sending someone off with dignity” is built in tradition, not in any actual fact that a person’s passing will be made simpler based on their funeral. This isn’t new. This goes back as deep as the Egyptians who were buried with all their treasures and possessions, as well as their servants, because they believed those things would be with them in the afterlife.

Funerals are more for those left behind than they are for the dead. We want the tradition, we want a nice casket and processional. We want a nice service. We want a burial plot to go back to and visit, and leave flowers. These emotions are valid. There is some sort of sense of closure, or rather, the beginning of getting over the grief, that comes when you leave the funeral, or see the casket lowered. You feel like you’ve been given permission to begin to move on, however long that takes. These emotions and need for the tradition are valid, yet expensive.

The funeral business is a BUSINESS indeed, and a lucrative one, that plays off the emotions of grieving families. Wanna know a secret that's probably not surprising? There is a HEAVY mark-up on funeral items, just like everything else.

Average cost to purchase a casket for the business: $605
Average charge for a casket: $1,815
That’s a 3x mark-up.

This is the reality. A reality that many people don’t even realize until they are in the face of a loss and planning a funeral. There are pre-pay options for services, in which you lock-in a rate instead of paying whatever the going rate is 20 years down the road. But not many people know about this option or even take it because honestly, we don’t like to think about death and dying.

*cue happy music*
Well, that was morbid, but I had to get it out. I’ve been meaning to write this for a few months. Here, have three cute puppies yawning to make you feel better :-)

Alcatraz: First Impressions

2012-01-17T12:39:00.003-05:00

I love some good TV. I've been excited for the pilot of Alcatraz since I'd seen the commercials. I'm happy to report I wasn't disappointed by FOX's newest series. The basic premise is that 40ish years ago all the prisoners and guards of Alcatraz (LOL at me almost typing "Azkaban") prison disappeared, and are now returning in present day... only they haven't aged at all...and they are killing people.

I'm totally digging the "monster of the week" series format they're going with. In their case, the "monsters" are former Alcatraz inmates returning, not looking a day older than the day they disappeared 40ish years ago. The team's goal is to catch each prisoner before they kill, and lock them back up where they belong.

I really enjoyed the main team/pair. Visually they are an unlikely duo, and that makes me happy. Sarah Jones plays Rebecca Madsen, a fiery, blonde haired, blue eyed detective. I love her character so far. Jorge Garcia plays Diego Soto, a comic book loving historian. I can appreciate the duality of his character's smarts with his love for comic books and video games.

Of course the big questions of HOW these inmates have not aged in 40 years, WHERE they've been for 40 years and WHY they're returning now are all left to be answered. I'm really hoping these questions get answered throughout the season. Right now, I'm fine with not knowing, as things are just getting started. There seems to be a hint that maybe some medical experimentation was going on in Alcatraz. I don't need to know the answers to those questions right now, but I'll be sad if at the end of the season I feel like I did with Persons Unknown or The Killing, where no answers had been given, just more questions!

I give the pilot 2 thumbs up, and I'm looking forward to seeing where the series goes!

Blogger Spotlight Series: Angela of "Lariats and Lavender"

2012-01-16T09:30:00.000-05:00

This is the second installment in my Blogger Spotlight Series. This time I have the pleasure of introducing you to the lovely Angie of Lariats and Lavender. I subscribe to a lot of different types of blogs. In some cases, I just enjoy reading about other people's lives. I can't remember when I stumbled upon Angie's blog, but since subscribing I've enjoyed reading her about life, clothes, coffee, games (The Sims 3 for the win!), and True Blood paraphernalia lol.She keeps up with a lot of different blog series' which makes her content nicely diverse.

Here is what the lovely Angie had to say about herself and blogging:

How long have you been blogging?

I've been blogging since 2009, however I "officially" became a blogger in my opinion on January 1st, 2011. So - a little over a year!

What made you start a blog?

I love meeting new people, making new friends and learning about other states & cities, careers & lifestyles, hobbies & interests - plus, I wanted to get my own voice out there, share who I am, who I love, what I do, what I like, what I don't like, etc.! Basically, I wanted my own little home on the web and that's what I have in Lariats and Lavender!

What was your vision when you first started blogging and how has that changed over time?

When I first started blogging, I truly didn't think I'd make actual friendships. I thought I'd get a comment here and there, leave comments here and there and... That was all. I read many stories of other bloggers making friends in the community, real true blue friends and I just didn't think that could actually happen... As of right now, I can say some of my best and closest friends are ladies I've met via my blog and theirs! It's amazing!!!

You seem to have a nice blog following, what do you think contributes to that?

I socialize ALL THE TIME. I love chatting with people and I'm definitely a people person - I love sharing, talking, helping others out and generally, I really am just a busy bee on the web. *wink* Because of that, I think a lot of people I follow, follow me back or at least stop by to say hello. I also share my blog on various websites like 20sb.net, Twitter.com, Pinterest.com, Facebook.com... All of those fun little places! I have loads of fun with my blog and I know you get what you give! So I give a lot to my blog - my design, my posts, my little series', etc.

What advice do you have for the aspiring blogger?

Be yourself! Seriously, I slipped into "trying to please others" when I first started blogging and I didn't enjoy my blog one bit - on top of that, I didn't please *anyone*. When I was trying to act like someone I was not, I didn't have many commenters or followers, nor did I make any friends that way. Once I started being Angie, and didn't care what anyone else thought, that's when my blog really picked up and when I started truly enjoying myself. We are all special and unique individuals, no matter our age, gender, hobbies, lifestyle, religion, career or what have you! So be yourself and ROCK IT!

Married bloggers either constantly post pictures of their significant others or never post pictures of them. What influences your decision about how much or little to share of your wife?

I really go by what she is comfortable with! She's really a HUGE part of my blog: she helped me choose my name, I ask her advice on my web design, I run little series' past her and almost everyone who I've befriended is a common name in our house! Plus she supports my blog 100%, which is super sweet. She doesn't really mind what I share, except for pictures because she is extremely camera shy! I have one picture of her on my blog right now and it's one we both LOVE.

Where on the internet outside of your blog can you be found?

Twitter // Facebook // Pinterest // Polyvore

Deal: Premium Wordpress Plugins

2012-01-15T15:02:00.000-05:00

I'm a Blogger.com gal myself, as you can see. But for my readers who host on Wordpress here is a really good deal on a site that specializes in Wordpress plugins. Their tagline is "It's like having your own WordPress Developer, for a tiny fraction of the cost!"

Birthday Thoughts

2012-01-15T09:30:00.000-05:00

Guess what? I turned 26 yesterday lol.

My thoughts about turning 26?

I don't feel any older. I never FEEL any older on a birthday, but this was the first year that I actually felt that my age denoted getting older. I mean, 26, that's on the way to 30. Unmistakeably an adult, no longer "early 20s."

What did I do?

The special highlight of my birthday was a trip to The Melting Pot, a fondue restaurant. I know, how fancy? lol I'll admit, in the beginning the hubby and I were a little skeptical. The prices were a little high, we'd never eaten fondue out, and... we were going to have to make our food OURSELVES. Our initial fears were unwarranted and we had a GREAT time. The food was delicious, and the cooking mechanism was really simple... throw your meat on a fondue scure, let it sit in the broth for 2 minutes, and wala... wonderfully cooked, shrimp, sausage and steak, with delicious dipping sauces. And of course the desert course was even better. Flambeed chocolate with marshmallow and oreo cookies on top. For dipping? Strawberries, cheesecake, rice krispy treats, pound cake, red velvet cake, marshmallows AND bananas! I wanted to do something that was more of an experience this year, not just your average trip to dinner, and I was very satisfied. Thanks to my wonderful hubby for the treat!

For all of my past birthday blog posts check out my birthday tag.

Black AND Latino

2012-01-14T11:54:00.000-05:00

I came across this video and I thought it was so phenomenal that I couldn't wait until next week to post it for YouTube Tuesday. This was produced by Mun2 and is such an interesting discussion on what it means to be Black AND Latino. I enjoyed hearing the perspectives of all those interviewed. We forget that issues of skin color and hair texture are not just limited to the context of African Americans in the U.S. It is a constant universal conversation. Check it out.

Walgreens vs. Express Scripts

2012-01-13T22:03:00.001-05:00

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Walgreens. All opinions are 100% mine.

I am fortunate enough to not have ever needed a constant prescription until a few years ago, and even then, it's family planning prescriptions and not the result of an ailment. I learned early on the importance of a reliable and easily accessible pharmacy and pharmacist. And when I realized there was such thing as a DRIVE-THROUGH pharmacy, it was a happy day.

Currently, many Americans are having their usual pharmacy visit routine shaken up. With all the other things life requires I can't imagine, especially in a case where I had multiple prescriptions, having to seek out and move pharmacies. This very thing is happening to many people and families as a result of termination of contract between Walgreens and Express Scripts. The result of this is patients covered by an Express Scripts plan now find themselves not only having to change their pharmacists, but many are having to drive farther to get prescriptions filled at pharmacies with less convenient hours for their hectic schedules and no longer have access to Walgreens 24-hour and drive-thru pharmacies.

A specific segment of American's being directly affected by this is military personnel and their families, who use Tricare, which is a health and prescription program for military service men and women. During negotiations, Walgreens attempted to protect the pricing and even contract separately for individuals with Tricare but no consensus was come to, leaving those individuals, who I'm sure have much more to think about than finding a new pharmacy, out of luck.

I am easily agitated when the people's needs are trampled on for the sake of greed or ill negotiation. Does it not make sense that a person should be able to fill a prescription at whatever pharmacy is nearest and easiest for them to access? It's enough that people are paying sometimes insane prices for medication they NEED to survive, but to make them spend the extra time and gas money to relocate and drive to a new pharmacy makes matters even worse.

To try to help their customers in some way Walgreens if offering a special discount on all annual memberships for it's Prescription Savings Club at Walgreens

To keep up with Walgreens and the aftermath of the dispute:

Walgreens on Twitter

Walgreens on Facebook

Deals, deals, deals...

2012-01-13T10:21:00.000-05:00

Just a heads up to my lovely readers. You will occasionally start seeing deal posts. If you are familiar with GroupOn or LivingSocial or those type of sites they work like that, deep discounts on goods and services. First one up: Family Cookbook Project. I wish I would have seen this before the holidays, but it's still a good idea if you have someone's birthday coming up, or maybe in preparation for summer family reunions:

Happy Friday Folks!

Celebrities and Celebrity Culture

2012-01-11T12:15:00.000-05:00

I can't for the life of me understand the public and the media's obsession with Beyonce's pregnancy and birth. People are going back and fourth debating her personal life like their livelihood depends on it - Was she really pregnant? Did she have a surrogate? Did she have a c-section? Those questions are so personal. I think people forget that celebrities are people too.

On the other hand, I sometimes think celebrities forget they are people. They expect worship from their fans and the public, and media coverage and money that they may or may not deserve because of "fame."

Celebrity culture is really something funny.

Celebrity doesn't necessarily equal talent. We live in a world where fame and celebrity trump talent when it comes to money, influence, and media coverage. This is easily exhibited by the world of reality TV stars. People who constantly work hard at their craft can't get a break, while Snooki can get endorsement deals and a best selling book. I'm not knocking her hustle, it just seems skewed to me.

It's our fault. Our being us, the people. If we didn't consume higher amounts of commercial entertainment than we did actual art things wouldn't be this way. We'll drop $150 on a pop music concert, but we'll say we can't afford a $25 ticket to support a talented local artist in performance. We put more value on celebrity culture than we do on fine arts and talent. We can SAY that isn't the case, but where we spend our money says otherwise. What we spend our time doing, watching, and talking about, says otherwise.

I don't think there is anything wrong with pop music and reality tv, I listen to it, I watch it, and the people who produce it are working too, but I just wish the scales were a little more balanced when it came to hard working talented artists reaping from all the hard work, blood, sweat, and tears, they sow.

Kids these days?

2012-01-06T11:47:00.001-05:00

I came across the video below and had a few different reactions. If you haven't seen, Jimmy Kimmel created YouTube challenge asking parents to give their kids horrible Christmas presents and film their reactions.

Now, I don't have kids, but I find it completely ABSURD when the children THREW the unwanted presents at their parents. Sure, it's not what you wanted, but as a child to have the audacity, and braveness to throw something at their parents! Should a child not have the discipline to not throw a pack of taco seasoning at their mom, even if they were expecting to open a Barbie doll?

Speaking of Barbie dolls, the reactions of the two boys who received Barbie dolls was SO EXTREME. You could see in their face that they felt like the world was laughing at their boyhood. Ingrained gender rolls strike again.

While I think it was a pretty cruel thing for the parents to do to their children, this is a clear example that the meaning of Christmas is still being lost. Kids want gifts, of course. But, we've got to teach them to be grateful for what they are given, regardless, even if they aren't at the age yet where we start teaching them that the season is about giving, not getting.

What do I want?

2012-01-05T17:43:00.000-05:00

Sometimes it can get so frustrating to want so many different things, and overwhelming to actually figure out what needs to be done to jump-start getting what you want.

What do I want? My driver's license.
First step to obtaining it: Studying the driver's manual so I can take the driver's permit test.

What do I want? To increase blog visibility and traffic.
First step to obtaining it: I believe content is key, so I need to get my creative juices flowing and make time to post regularly.

What do I want? More steady acting work.
First step to obtaining it: Making myself make time to find auditions and audition more frequently.

What do I want? To make upgrades to my house.
First step to making it happen: Pick one of the many blog posts that I have stored away in the "Home Decor" tag in my Google reader and actually make the plan to tackle one of the projects.

What do YOU want?

Pimp My Cube Contest

2012-01-02T16:36:00.001-05:00

This post brought to you by Contest Factory. All opinions are 100% mine.

The Pimp My Cube Contest is looking for the worst, most pathetic, unorganized, dirty and dank cubicle, complete with outdated technology. If your work space is not conducive with actually getting work done, Contest Factory is looking for you.

Upload a video showing your cube/office/workspace and explain why it is horrible, and why you deserve for your cubicle to be "pimped out." Once your video is entered, you must encourage your your friends, family, coworkers, etc. to vote for your video.

The grand prize winner will be selected based on votes, most compelling story, and worst cube. Videos should be fun and witty – anything goes! The better the story, the funnier the video – better chances of winning. The grand prize value is approximately $1200.

If you win, your office/workspace/cube will be updated with one of three prize packages:

o New high end computer system
o New Desk, Chair and Decorations
o New Entertainment Package with high end stereo, espresso machine etc.

A second sweepstakes prize of a $200 gift card will be awarded to the registered user chosen by random drawing at the end of the contest period.

The contest period is running now through 1/31/12 at 12:00PM. Sample contest video below:

imPRESS Press-on Manicure

2012-01-02T06:30:00.000-05:00

I received the "Lil Drumr Girl" pattern of Broadway imPRESS nails in my latest Influenster VoxBox. Because of the snazzy print I wanted to wear them for a special occasion, so I applied them before my New Years eve festivities.

They were SUPER easy to apply. I was also very pleased with the length, they weren't too long. I will suggest that if you have some length to your natural nails that you file them down a bit to fit. These are a GREAT alternative to acrylics, as they are cheaper, safer, and much quicker to apply. None of these things sacrifice the quality however, since my friends thought they were acrylics! I can definitely see myself buying these for special occasions. I usually don't get my nail polish to last for more than a day before it begins to wear down, but even after washing dishes and cleaning the house, the Broadway imPRESS nails have kept the integrity and luster of the color, and are still on strong.

The brand is really easily accessible, you can pick them up at CVS, Rite Aid, Duane Reade, KMart, Walgreens, and Walmart. If you aren't sure of what pattern or color will work for you, the website has an AWESOME try-on app.

ABCs of Fall/Winter: N is for NEW YEAR

2012-01-01T17:11:00.000-05:00

2012. It's here!

I rang in the New Year with my closest friends from college over pizza, alcohol, and karaoke. It was great.

2011 had so many ups and down for me. The highest being buying my first home with my husband, the lowest being almost losing my grandmother.

I've seen a lot people leading up to the New Year say something along the lines of "Why wait until the new year to do things right or change, why not just change right now?" You know what? While that may be valid, it's always nice to have a jumping off point, a definitive time to say "change starts now" and I don't fault anyone who uses the new year to do that.

As far as resolutions go, I believe in making attainable goals. Last year my resolution was to put on lotion every day, and I succeeded. This year, my resolution is to wash my face each night (as opposed to just in the morning).

I wish all of you success, prosperity, love, focus, and happiness in this new year. :-D

How are you feeling about 2012 thus far?

Montagne Jeunesse Cucumber Peel Off Face Mask

2011-12-29T21:03:00.000-05:00

I received the Montagne Jeunesse Cucumber Peel Off Face Mask through the Influenster VoxBox program. I was definitely looking forward to trying it out because I've been looking for some sort of "special" face treatment outside of my daily cleansing/toning routine. I wanted something I could use maybe once a week to give my face some special treatment.... and wala... enter the Montagne Jeunesse mask lol.

I give this product two thumbs up. It was easy to apply, and 30 minutes later it was SUPER easy to remove. The whole mask came off in one piece, I don't think I've EVER had that happen. It came off really easy and left my face nice and soft. The product claims to "remove dead skin and impurities" and from the.... gunk... I saw left on the mask, I can say it definitely upholds that promise. I recommend their masks if you're looking for a special face treatment. Other than the cucumber peel off mask they also have:

Passion Peel Off
Dead Sea Mud
Fruit Smoothie
Strawberry Souffle
Chocolate Mud
among other "flavors."

And they are only $2.25, buy one get one free on this site. As my grandmother would say, "Can't beat that with a stick!" :-D

Trim

2011-12-27T21:31:00.000-05:00

It is much easier to thread a needle if you have trimmed the end of the thread with scissors, versus trying to thread with a jagged piece of thread.

In order to facilitate maintaining length of hair, you have to trim off ragged/split/damaged ends.

A well cooked piece of meat is much more appetizing if the fat and skin have been trimmed away.

Do you see where I'm going with this? lol

TRIM. Trimming the dead, damaged, useless parts of life makes life easier, better, and more enjoyable.

In 2012, if it isn't making you happy, and it isn't making you money, trim it away.

iPhone 4s Woes

2011-12-26T21:07:00.003-05:00

The iPhone 4s has brought me many woes. There was my struggle to get one when they first came out after having not pre-ordered one. And there is my current quest to get a new one, or a repair of my currently cracked/shattered screen. On both occasions my emotions have been tied to the availability of my iPhone 4s. Sadness when it was unavailable, or in the current case, shattered, and happiness when I was able to obtain one, or the prospect of a (free) repair.

That is despicable! I am so ashamed of myself! With aaaallll the blessings in my life, how DARE I allow myself to be so easily manipulated by the status of an electronic? In the back of my mind I say all the right things: I don't NEED an iPhone 4s, it is just a gadget, I have way too much going for me to let a toy get me down..... but that doesn't stop me from pouting from my iPhone 4s woes.

*slaps self on the wrist*

I guess this just exhibits my fortunate-ness - if I can dwell on something as trivial as a gadget, with so many other things going on in life and in the world. I know I'm not the only one who goes goo-goo for gadgets, as exhibited by the huge number of people cursing this Christmas because they didn't get an iPhone or iPad 2, but that doesn't make me feel any better. I'm just in a despicable majority lol.

Christmas When You're Not a Kid

2011-12-24T16:06:00.000-05:00

I'd consider myself a big kid, especially when it comes to holidays and holiday rituals. Christmas tree decorating, pumpkin carving, Easter egg dying, I love that stuff. Being 25 years old, it's been a long time since I've had a real "kid's Christmas." But I love the season nonetheless.

This has been probably the most unideal holiday season of my life. Having to attend a funeral on Christmas Eve-eve among other things definitely has made it a challenge to keep up the positive composure that I'm accustom to having. But I have to realize that as an adult, life doesn't always go according to plan, and I'll never have another "kid's Christmas" again, but that doesn't mean Christmas can't still be great. As life changes, our expectations need to change, and that doesn't mean lowering them, but rather, re-imagining them.

This has been both one of the best and worst years, and I'm excited for what 2012 has in store.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of you, my lovely blog followers. :-D

ABCs of Fall/Winter: M is for MOVIES

2011-12-22T09:36:00.000-05:00

There is nothing better, maybe besides music, to get me in the winter/Christmas spirit than my favorite holiday movies! Some of my favorites are:

Scrooged - starring Bill Murray. It's a classic

Along the same lines - A Divas Christmas Carol. I've always thought it was a great twist on the A Christmas Carol tale.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas - another classic, both the original cartoon movie, and the movie with Jim Carrey

A Year Without Santa Clause - Snow Miser and Heat Miser? You can't go wrong lol

What are some of your favorite Christmas/Holiday/Winter movies?

Check out my The Best Versions of the Best Christmas Songs post for more holiday cheer :-)

Grief

2011-12-19T14:57:00.000-05:00

The feeling of grief is SO HUGE compared to how short the word is. It's all encompassing. Consuming. Your head spins and your brain hurts trying to contemplate actual finality. Your heart breaks. Physically it feels like a heart pinch. Like death pinches a piece of your heart off with each loss that you can never get back. It's pain, and confusion, and disbelief all wrapped into one. It's a sensation of falling that never quite goes away, you just begin to get used to it over time.

ABCs of Fall/Winter: L is for LIGHTS

2011-12-16T11:11:00.000-05:00

As the temperature gets a little colder, this ABCs series will slowly turn from Fall to Winter... hopefully I finish before I have to include Spring too lol.

LIGHTS.

One of my favorite parts of the season. Lights on houses, lights in doors, lights on Christmas trees, candle light. It's all a win. I sadly have not gotten decorations for our house yet but I plan to on Saturday. I don't think any fall/winter/holiday festivities are complete without some sort of festive lighting. And no matter what people celebrate during this time, light, is often important.

How are lights incorporated into this time of year for you?

For A - K of the ABCs of Fall/Winter series go HERE.

Product Review: NYC New York Color Liquid Lip Shine

2011-12-15T21:05:00.001-05:00

I received the "Nude York City" shade of NYC New York liquid lip shine complimentary in my latest Influenster VoxBox. I was very excited that they gave a full size to sample!

It is a nude shade, so it doesn't have much color on the lips, although you can see the shade on your drinking glass or napkin. Lip shine is a good way to describe it because it does give a nice shiny gloss. It is a little on the heavy side, but I believe that contributes to how long it lasts, which is long. I applied it in the morning and it lasted well through the afternoon. It has no taste, but a pleasant smell, which is imperative for something to close to your nose lol. I really like the type of applicator it uses, almost like a large Q-tip, it makes for a nice controlled application.

I give the Nude York City NYC New York liquid lip shine 4 out of 5 stars.

If you like the internet, you like the internet...

2011-12-14T10:56:00.000-05:00

Very often, especially in the summer months, you'll see people on social networks (ironically) telling people to get out of the house and away from the computer to enjoy the outdoors, or interact with people in person. I do find this to be valid. To me, it is important to get out and be social in person, enjoy the outdoors, etc. BUT, who are we to judge the "best" or "most valuable" way for someone else to spend their time?

If a person finds absolute joy in never leaving their computer desk over the weekend, is that so bad? If after a hard week's work they only want to communicate with other people through screens and microphones is that so wrong? I don't see anything wrong with a person who is ABLE to be social, but prefers to lock themselves down with gadgets, doing so.

It took me a long time to come to terms with this though. My husband and I are very opposite in that to me the weekend isn't a weekend if I don't get to get out of the house and do something. To him, the more times he has to leave the house over the weekend, the less of a weekend it is lol. At first I couldn't understand for the life of me why someone would not want to get out and be social in the "real" world instead of the virtual one. But you know what? Everyone is different, and all forms of entertainment, as long as they don't hurt others, are valid.

When you have off-time, do you prefer the real world or the virtual world?

Why I love Groupon

2011-12-12T08:45:00.000-05:00

Deal type e-mail lists (Groupon, Living Social, etc) are a new trend that seems to be expanding day by day. I think they're success definitely has something to do with the current economic climate. Getting more for less is appealing now more than ever.

I really like Groupon because it offers the average person luxury services/items that they either couldn't normally afford, or can't normally justify spending money on. So far I've gotten self service dog washing, food at an Indian restaurant and house cleaning services. Common offers are spa treatments, manicures/pedicures, trips, etc. I enjoy the ability to do things I might not be able to normally justify doing, at half the price.

I do wonder how the half-off deal wave is affecting businesses. I'm sure the hope is that the exposure of the offer will bring new and lasting customers, but I don't think things really pan out that way.

What has your experience been with deal-of-the-day type websites? How many are you subscribed to?

Haven't tried one yet? Take 2 minutes and sign up to Groupon.

The Holidays are What YOU Make Them

2011-12-11T14:56:00.001-05:00

Tis the season.... to be bitter?

For me, this is a wonderful time of year. I love the holidays. Everything to be celebrated between Thanksgiving and my birthday (Jan. 14th) is awesome to me. I love Christmas.

I've been seeing a lot of chatter, both on social networks, and "real life" of people complaining that the holidays are too commercial, or they hate all the ad campaigns and think this time of year is just an excuse to spend money.

While businesses, if they are smart, will take advantage of the habit of people to spend more during this time of year, what does that have to do with YOU? The holidays are what YOU make them. No one is forcing you to spend your holidays emptying your pocket book. Do what you do to enjoy this time of year. Focus on being thankful, spending time with family, the birth of Jesus (for some), holiday music and traditions, and even rest. I hate to see people allow themselves to be turned off completely because they see an uptick in commercials or sales. Don't allow your holiday spirit to be Grinched away like that. Even if you don't celebrate a specific holiday around this time, who says you can't take advantage of the tenants of good cheer and good will towards men?

You only live once. Be happy. Enjoy.

Blogger Spotlight: Marie of merelymarie.com

2011-12-01T13:35:00.001-05:00

Hooray! This is my very first Blogger Spotlight! Today I will spotlight Marie of merelymarie.com

Marie is definitely one of my favorite bloggers. I probably found her via a natural hair post, but her blog is about so much more than hair, which is why I like it so much. She blogs about fashion, beauty, life and food. I don't think I've seen a recipe of hers yet that I didn't love. She actually turned me on to parmesan shrimp which I make with pasta tossed with a little olive oil - it is now one of my husband's favorite dishes!

See what Marie had to say about her blogging experiences:

How long have you been blogging?

Over two years.

What made you start a blog?
Reading blogs. I was inspired by people who shared their lives & their knowledge; and were earning income from it by blogging. The beautiful photos, and the discussions/interactions that happened between complete strangers also interested me. I thought it all super cool & wanted to experience the other side of blogging.

What was your vision when you first started blogging and how has that changed over time?   question, with a rather long answer! LOL When I first started blogging, my vision was to be a “big-time” food blogger. I wanted my old blog to be the next Smitten Kitchen; in fact, I wanted it to be bigger! After a year or so, I discovered that that wasn’t going to happen because the blog started to feel like an obligation. I loved food, and cooking & sharing that experience with every new recipe, but that wasn’t all that I wanted to share. I wanted to blog about style & shopping, talk about hair, and express my personal thoughts on random subjects like jealousy, and being a "quiet person"; as well as blogging about food.

I’d finally realized that I started that blog off a bad, and not to mention impossible vision…only Smitten Kitchen can be Smitten Kitchen! LOL I had to be me; so, the “wanna-be” blog was closed, and I started a fresh one; a blog that was…that is all me, and all that I truly care about. Now, my vision is clear & genuine: to continue blogging about what I love, be who I am, try my best, continue to grow the blog and hopefully monetize it successfully enough to earn a decent, steady stream of income.

You seem to have a nice blog following, what do you think contributes to that (besides your awesome content :-D) ?
Thanks! Yes, good content is key & good photos go a long way. Updating regularly (at the very least, once a week) also helps, as well as keeping readers in the know when new posts will be delayed. Most avid blog readers don’t like to be left hanging without updates! LOL I get complimented on the aesthetics of my blog, so I definitely think a good design draws new readers to follow.

I’m also a member on different online forums/sites that interest me. Other members can find a link to my blog in my profile, and I inbox online friends with personal invites. I’ve also recommended my blog for special blog features & spotlights, like this one;)

What advice do you have for the aspiring blogger?
Pick a topic, or a few that you really love, open an account, & start blogging! It’s cool to be inspired by other blogs, but don’t do like I did & totally base your blog after theirs. That’s a sure-fire way to lose interest in blogging.  Try to update on a consistent basis, and keep a blog notebook nearby at all times. You never know what random thoughts (& things that happen throughout your day) could make a great blog post. You want to have something to jot it down (or type it in), before it escapes you.  Lastly, keep at it. If blogging really interests you, don’t stop.

Tell us about your blog design company. What made you start it?
MerelyBlogDesign is a blog design service that caters to niche, personal, and small business bloggers. I design blog logos, headers, buttons, and layouts to meet the needs of my clients.  Supplementing my blog with a product/service was always in my vision. The idea to create these specific services became clear to me when I realized how much time I spent in the design section of my Blogger dashboard; I loved going in there & changing things around & adding CSS codes for a new look (almost more than writing posts)! Only after that did I remember that I am a professional graphic designer. LOL All the compliments that I’d received on my blog’s design rolled into my head soon after, to seal the deal; and MerelyBlogDesign was born.

Where on the internet outside of your blog can you be found?  I’m on Facebook, Pinterest, & MerelyBlogDesign
http://www.facebook.com/pages/MerelyMarie/148011985252384
http://pinterest.com/merelymarie/
http://blogdesign.merelymarie.com/

If YOU would like a blogger spotlight fill out the short entry form HERE.

The ABCs of Fall: K is for Kids

2011-11-30T10:54:00.001-05:00

The fall makes me think of kids- having my own kids, and how it felt to be a kid at this time of year. The anticipation of Thanksgiving break, and then winter break. Crafting gift wish lists. Decorating. Holiday parties at school. Playing in the leaves. Delicious holiday foods. My grandma checking to see I'm wearing a warm enough coat, hat and gloves --- well actually, she still does that, even from three states away lol

I'm excited for the falls of the future where my husband and I will have added to our family, and we get to show our kids old traditions, and create new ones.

Check out A-J of the ABCs of Fall series HERE.

Have cappuccinos & lattes in your office for FREE!

2011-11-29T00:00:00.001-05:00

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Tassimo. All opinions are 100% mine.

Beverage company Tassimo is offering FREE demos of their Tassimo Professional single-cup hot beverage system. If you are interested in having your office or staff try out one of their brewers visit Tassimo Professional free demo to sign up. Be the office hero and get your staff some free hot beverages! lol

The Tassimo Pro makes coffee-house style beverages with Gevalia espresso and real milk creamer. For those that can't handle caffeine it also makes hot chocolate and tea! Beverages are ready in less than two minutes, and the LCD instructions make prep, cleaning and maintenance simple. I looked on the Tassimo Professional website and the Suchard brand hot chocolate looks divine.

The technology behind the brewer is the T DISCS - unique double-bar brew codes that ensure precise brewing and consistent quality. FYI - the double bar codes on TASSIMO PRO T DISCS help prevent employee stealing because they are not compatible with home machines - in case you were worried about the staff stealing the discs for their home ;-)

I signed up because I'm definitely part of a coffee-drinking staff, and being able to get a hot beverage in the office kitchen vs. "out in the world" as the weather starts to get colder would be very nice. Those who have been keeping up with my ABC's of Fall series know that I LOVE a good hot beverage, and I appreciate any way to make my love more convenient and cost effective.

The ABCs of Fall: Jackets

2011-11-28T17:27:00.001-05:00

Wow. If I don't hurry up and finish this series soon, I'll have to move onto the ABC's of WINTER lol.

Jackets. Part of the staple wardrobe as the temperature starts to drop in that space between summer and winter. I'm a person who's generally cold, so I like the comfort of a nice fall jacket - although I'm not as fond of bulky winter coats.

My current fall jacket looks like this, only it's brown and it has a hood. A simple pea coat. But it is SO warm that I can wear it in the winter with a sweater under and stay pretty warm. I got it from Burlington Coat Factory, which is my go-to jacket/coat purchasing spot. Other than one really good coat I got from L.L.Bean, any coat that I get from somewhere other than Burlington fails me.

I'm pretty satisfied with my current jacket situation, but if I did NEED another jacket I like some of these looks:

What are your fall jacket preferences?

Check out A-I of the ABCs of Fall HERE.

Occupy the Homeless

2011-11-18T15:59:00.001-05:00

There has been a lot of talk about how "Occupy" has brought out the "bad elements" in the cities being occupied, namely, the homeless and drug pushers/addicts. The thing is, the Occupy movement didn't CREATE these homeless people, the movement just gave them more access to shelter and food than they had before. What created these homeless people in many instances is what Occupiers are rallying against, a system that is built to keep the rich, rich, and the poor, poor.

Homelessness is a separate yet related issue. These homeless people have always been homeless. If anything, there should be more work done to protect and shelter the homeless, and services to get them back on their feet, now that it is more apparent to the mainstream how many homeless people there really are. I know in Philly the homeless had been often relegated to trash diving and sleeping in the darkest of corners in underground tunels of the subway lines. Now they can reside on the surface where there is better food, shelter, and even heat. Who can blame them?

What's unfortunate in this whole thing is the way many media outlets have twisted the homeless's presence into constant bylines about how Occupy protesters are all homeless, jobless, vagrants, which isn't true.

Dissecting Retail Therapy

2011-11-15T12:03:00.001-05:00

Wikipedia calls retail therapy: shopping with the primary purpose of improving the buyer's mood or disposition. Often seen in people during periods of depression or transition, it is normally a short-lived habit. Items purchased during periods of retail therapy are sometimes referred to as "comfort buys".

I was thinking deeper about the concept of retail therapy and I think I pinpointed something important. Often times the things that put us in a bad mood are instances where we don't feel valued. We don't feel we as people, our opinions or our wants/needs are valued in some way. Retail therapy is a way of showing OURSELVES that we value OURSELVES. It's a purchase that says, if no one else cares about me, I do. Even if that feeling is fleeting or not really accurate after the smoke clears, it's still the feeling I believe fuels retail therapy.

I love a good retail therapy session, and while I wouldn't advocate for people to go off spending money they don't have, sometimes it's nice to show appreciation to yourself in the midst of feeling unappreciated.

Blogger Spotlight Series

2011-11-14T15:54:00.001-05:00

I would like to start a series here where I highlight other bloggers. I hope to showcase some of the blogs I really enjoy as well as be turned on to new blogs to read. Blogging is such a communal activity and that is something I love about it. This is one way I hope to expand my blogging community. If you have a blog you'd like to submit for a Blogger Spotlight feature, or if you would like to submit a blog of a friend, fill out the short form HERE.

Need a break?

2011-11-13T14:42:00.001-05:00

Sometimes life can just be busy. Even if every one of your tasks is something you signed on for, or things you enjoy doing, a full schedule is a full schedule and can leave you feeling burned out sometimes. No one should be ashamed to admit when they need a break. That doesn't mean you can't handle hard work, that means you are a SMART worker. You take the time you need in order to get your work done, rather than burning yourself out and being of no use to others or yourself.

Here are some tips on "breaking":

Enjoy mini-breaks - If you don't have the luxury of taking as much time as you want, enjoy the little breaks you do have - your lunch hour, the commute between one obligation and another, even using the bathroom! lol. Make the most of the times when you don't have obligations. Often, instead of enjoying those times we'll spend the whole time thinking about how we wish we had more time, and then the little reprieve you did have is wasted!

Indulge a little - When your schedule is full, and you find you have no time, enjoy little things that you don't always allow yourself to enjoy - a salted caramel mocha instead of your usual plain coffee, a cookie, or make a purchase for something you'll get to enjoy once your schedule clears up more.

Yoga, naps, anything to turn your brain off - When you have a lot to do, your thoughts can become so loud and overwhelming. You're thinking of all you have to do, what needs to be done first, etc. Take some time to enjoy activities that can clear your mind - yoga, or a good old nap. Even 30 minutes to let your mind take a break is beneficial.

What are your tips on handling the need to take a break when you don't have much time?

My thoughts on Conrad Murray

2011-11-10T12:55:00.002-05:00

If you know me, you know I was/am one of the hugest Michael Jackson fans. To me he is unrivaled as one of the best performers of all time. When he died, I was devastated to say the least. Unlike many fans, I didn't feel the need to point the finger at anyone. To me it was a horrible misfortune and a loss to the music industry but it wasn't anyone's "fault."

Many have blamed Dr. Conrad Murray. Dr. Murray gave him a cocktail of drugs, some of which are supposed to be used only in hospitals with vital sign monitoring and life saving equipment, to help him sleep and left him unsupervised. In that unsupervision, the King of Pop died.

Dr. Murray has recently been found guilty of involuntary manslaughter. No one, authorities or otherwise, think he intentionally killed Michael Jackson, but there was definitely medical neglect, and he was operating under much lower standards than he most likely would have operated under with a "normal" patient.

But his patient was Michael Jackson. While I don't let Dr. Murray off the hook, I feel like he was in an extraordinary circumstance. His patient was a hugely powerful person, a household name. He wanted to treat and please him because of his stature.

This is the problem with power. You can get to a point where you are so powerful that people can allow you to get what you want, regardless of if it is "good" for you. This is the case in so many celebrity deaths related to drugs. It is so important to have people around you who will not be afraid to make sure you keep your best interest at heart. Michael Jackson had so many people hired to serve him in various ways - I doubt any of them ever told him no either. Where were the people in Michael Jackson's life with the power to tell him no, the power to assist Dr. Murray in trying to ween Michael Jackson off of propofol when he believed it was becoming habit forming? Did anyone exist? His mother? His brothers or sisters? Was it even their responsibility?

I feel sorry for Conrad Murray. I feel sorry because I think he was caught up in a whirlwind that ended in disaster. I can say that he was negligent and I could agree with his medical license being revoked. Is Michael Jackson's death his fault? I don't know. Is an involuntary manslaughter charge the right thing? I don't know.

Thoughts?

Why I love "Reed Between the Lines"

2011-11-08T22:23:00.000-05:00

It's the only show that makes me dare to turn my television to BET --- "Reed Between the Lines." When I saw the previews I was excited for the show to premiere and I have not been disappointed. Why do I love "Reed Between the Lines"?

Tracee Ellis Ross - I will admit, I wasn't a big "Girlfriends" fan. (*gasp* I know lol). I did like the show, and I watched many of the reruns, but I wasn't awaiting each new episode, I can't even tell you what night it came on. What I do know that made me like the show was Tracee Ellis Ross. I find her to be a nice actress, and funny, and stylish, and of course - I love her hair! She was a great leading lady then, and she continues to carry that title in "Reed."

A relationship like mine - I ADORE the relationship between Tracee Ellis and Malcolm Jamal Warner's characters. It is quite honestly the closest representation of the type of relationship my husband and I have. They are goofy, and loving and just, real. I haven't seen a couple this close to how we are since "My Wife and Kids." I love having the representation of a loving stable Black relationship on television. It balances all the other representations we see too often of non committed and overtly sexual relationships.

Content - The show touches on natural hair, being yourself, honesty, etc. etc. Wholesome topics. Many critics say it's too cookie cutter but I for one am happy to see a family friendly dialogue on television. I am happy to see issues discussed in a universal way. It doesn't rival the Cosby Show, but I think it does make great strides in presenting a stable family and family values in a time when reality TV has been ruling.

Have you watched "Reed Between the Lines"? What do you think of it?

ABCs of Fall: I is for Ideal Weather & Impending Holidays

2011-10-31T13:41:00.000-04:00

Ideal Weather:

Now, while there was a Nor'easter this weekend, bringing SNOW in October, the weather at the ONSET of fall is ideal lol. Second to spring, I find it the most comfortable weather. Being able to walk around with just a light sweater on, on a solid 70 degree day is awesome. It's so strange how 70 degrees in the fall feels different than 70 degrees in the spring.

Impending Holidays:

I know I'm not the only one thinks Thanksgiving and Christmas at the first sight of leaves falling. Fall brings us into the "holiday season." Thanksgiving -> Christmas -> My Birthday -> Valentines Day .... do you see how I think ahead? lol

Check out A - H of the ABCs of Fall HERE. Depending on how fast it gets really cold, the series might transition into the ABCs of winter mid-alphabet lol

Anti-Gender Roles WIN

2011-10-29T20:31:00.000-04:00

I was flipping through the recent Sears Toy Shop brochure looking for Christmas present ideas for my niece and was SO happy to see the page below:

What made me so happy you ask? That would be the little BOY pushing a PINK toy vacuum cleaner. It made me so happy. This is a step in the right direction to tackling socially ingrained gender roles. Boys can like pink, boys can clean.

I for one am SO OVER the notion that women are the cleaners and cookers and child raisers of the family. In a world like we live in now where both the man and woman in a relationship have to work to be financially stable, cooking, cleaning, and child watching needs to be a joint effort.

I hope there is a little boy somewhere in the world who is excited and asking for a little pink vacuum cleaner. Now I just need to see a little girl playing happily with a toy truck :-)

Anti-Monogamists

2011-10-20T09:25:00.000-04:00

I have noticed a large swell in the articles I read from people who are both single and in marriages/relationships who don't believe in monogamy. Usually the premise is that humans are just not meant to only sleep with one person. To me, this sounds crazy lol, but I have to take into consideration that everyone's lives are different and everyone has the right to define their relationship as they see fit. I personally believe that you can be completely happy married to and only sleeping with one person. But that's because that is my reality. Everyone's life isn't my life.

I have no problem with the "non-monogamists" of the world. I do however have a problem with "anti-monogamists," if that makes sense. Those are the people who tear monogamists because they dare to believe they can be happy with just one person. To them I say: don't place your circumstances on others. Just because you have never found a person worth marrying, or worth being monogamous for doesn't mean monogamy/marriage is flawed, it means your relationships have failed at monogamy.

Are you a monogamist?

Why do I tweet?

2011-10-19T10:48:00.000-04:00

When that random earthquake hit the east coast this summer I was in a staff meeting. The first thing we all did after realizing what happened was take out our smart phone to tweet and facebook the experience. The first thing many people do when something exciting, scary, surprising ,fun, etc. happens, is tweet. Why is that? I don't think this is a trend anyone could foresee back in 2004 before Facebook hit.

Why do I tweet? I don't know, but I love it lol. Some of the reasons I've come up with are:

I'm random. Twitter exhibits the randomness of my mind as one second I'll be tweeting about how I feel about the Occupy Wallstreet protests and the next minute I'll be tweeting about my love for plantains. Exhibit A of my randomness:

I love to share things. Twitter is the perfect vehicle for me to share links, pictures, articles, etc. I find online that are either funny or insightful.

It's my social media hub. Twitter is where all my online lives converge. I've got friends from "real life," blogger buddies, the natural hair community, all in one place. Since my facebook is private, my twitter is the space linking my twitter, my blog, my facebook, my tumblr and life all together lol

Do you tweet?

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER @NESHEAHOLIC

YouTube Tuesday: Beyoncé "Countdown" Parody: Student Loan Countdown

2011-10-18T10:56:00.000-04:00

It's been a while since I've posted a YouTube Tuesday video, but today I have a nice one. Check out fabulous vlogger Chescaleigh's parody of Beyonce's "Countdown" - "Student Loan Countdown." I thought it was funny, and she has a nice voice. Check out some of her other videos too, she has an awesome personality and charisma.

ABCs of Fall: H is for Hot Chocolate!

2011-10-16T13:53:00.000-04:00

Check out A - G of the ABCs of Fall HERE

With cold weather comes warm beverages, as you know, since A and C of my ABCs of fall have been dedicated to them lol. Another warm beverage that makes the list is Hot Chocolate. Now I love the old school hot chocolate with marshmallows, but as I've gotten older I've run into a few more decadent varieties of hot chocolate:

White Hot Chocolate - it has a different creamy goodness than other types of hot chocolate. Most coffee shops, even Starbucks have a good white hot chocolate. But for store bought make at home, I've found the Hershey's Goodnight Hugs White Hot Chocolate powder to be awesome. I'd definitely like to try my hand at making some homemade white hot chocolate myself, with some white chocolate chips and heavy cream. Of course Mrs. Paula Deen has a recipe.

Mexican Spiced Hot Chocolate - The coffee shop near my job, Cafe Ole, has a really good Mexican Spiced Hot Chocolate. They always say that adding a little bit of spice to chocolate brings out the chocolate flavor more, and that definitely works here. It is one of my favorite fall/winter beverages, and the fact that I can get it with a shot of espresso if I need an extra boost makes it all the better.

I do want to try something I've been hearing people raving about since last winter, Starbucks Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate. I love caramel, and I can only imagine the combination of salted caramel and chocolate.

Whats your favorite type of hot chocolate?

From Scratch, or From a Box?

2011-10-15T13:17:00.000-04:00

I have spent relatively the whole morning baking a cake. It was a recipe my husband found online a few months back, and I figured our two year marriage anniversary would be a good time to make it for him. We're starting a tradition of cake on every anniversary. The first anniversary was our thawed wedding cake, and this anniversary was this chocolate peanut butter cake. Everything was from scratch: cake, icing, and ganache. I boiled, blended, beat, whipped, baked and eventually washed about three sinks worth of dishes. I probably spent three times as much time making the cake as I would have if I baked a box cake. Was it worth it? Well, for this occasion I say definitely yes. But it made me think about making something from scratch, vs. buying pre-made things in store. I thought about the same things the first time I made my own alfredo sauce for pasta, vs. just buying a jar. There are pros and cons of making things from scratch.

PROS:

You know exactly what you are putting into your body. When you make something from scratch you have complete control over ingredients. You can alter things to your dietary needs, and season/flavor to your liking. More often than not making something from scratch is going to provide healthier food than buying boxed. The cake I made is only a little over 100 calories per slice because of a key substitution...BLACK BEANS instead of oil. Yes, you read right, black beans lol. You can't taste them at all, and the cake is perfectly moist, without the addition of oil.

Pride. There is a greater sense of pride when making something from scratch. Because you take the time and measure out all the ingredients it feels like more of an accomplishment.

CONS:

Time. Hands down, making something from scratch will always be more time consuming than making something from a box. This is the number con.

Dishes. You will most likely end up using more pots, bowls, blenders, mixers, etc. when cooking from scratch, especially when baking.

Here is my cake side by side with the photo of the cake from the recipe lol. I promise you I am MUCH better at piping icing than this looks, but I was using a ziploc bag with an end cut off, and not an actually piping bag lol

Which do you prefer? Making from scratch or a box?

ABCs of Fall: G is for Ghouls and Goblins

2011-10-14T12:55:00.000-04:00

To me, you can't have fall without it's two staple holidays: Halloween and Thanksgiving. And you can't have Halloween without SCARY things. I enjoy being scared. While I'm not one to go on too many roller-coasters that will throw me upside down, I'll take a good haunted house any day.

My schedule has become super busy, but at some point before the Halloween season is over I have to make a return trip to "Terror Behind the Walls" at Eastern State Penitentiary. The first time I went was my freshman year of college, and it easily made it on the top three haunted houses I've ever experienced. One of the rules is no running, but at one point during the tour I recall myself running full speed down a prison corridor. I couldn't help myself lol.

I'm also keeping my ghoul and goblin quotient up with my fall TV line-up. Currently I'm watching American Horror Story on FX, which is so creepy I literally had nightmares from the second episode. I'm also waiting for the return of The Walking Dead on AMC.

Do you like scary movies, tv, haunted houses, etc. during Halloween time? What are you doing to fill your ghoul and goblin quota?

For A-F of the ABCs of Fall CLICK HERE

My life is so hard

2011-10-12T16:43:00.001-04:00

Contrary to the title, my life is not at all hard really. When one of us is complaining about some mundane thing, my husband and I will say to each other "your life is hard." What we're really saying is, our life is not really hard at all in comparison to many others. It's our way of poking fun at the dramatics we put on about our not so big problems, like waking up early, or not having any more chocolate in the house. Of course we have problems like anyone else, but at the end of the day, I truly feel blessed.

My grandmother is FINALLY coming home next week, after 6 months between different hospitals and a nursing home.
My husband just got promoted.
I just got cast in a show.
We will be celebrating our 2 year wedding anniversary on the 18th of this month.

Life is good, and I need to remember that when I'm stressing over my cold or our dog making a mess. We are so blessed.

ABCs of Fall: F is for Foliage

2011-10-11T11:34:00.000-04:00

There is something both calming and motivating about the colors the fall brings. The primary inspiration for the fall color palate of course is fall foliage, the leaves, flowers and branches preparing for the winter.

The only downside of course to fall foliage is if the trees happen to be in your yard. In that case, with foliage comes RAKING lol.

Check out letters A-E of the ABCs of Fall series HERE.

Naturally Connected Philly Holiday DIY Hair Accessory Meet & Greet

2011-10-10T10:27:00.000-04:00

For tickets in advance GO HERE.

This should be a good time. I'm excited! :-D Tell your friends!

Big Picture Thinking

2011-10-09T15:33:00.000-04:00

"Think about the bigger picture." - Don't you have when people say that? But really, it's true. Thinking about the bigger picture can ease some anxieties and frustrations. This happens in two ways. When you are in the midst of a hard trial or process, thinking about the bigger picture can keep in perspective for you what all your hard work is for and will result in.

There is also the issue of having personal trials, and then thinking about the bigger picture, as in the things other people around you have to deal with. You may have to work late every night for two weeks, and you feel exhausted, but you can be consoled in the fact that you are safe, and happy and have a loving family in your home when you get there, and not everyone has that.

The thought that there is someone else who has things way harder than yourself should motivate you to be grateful, even in times of exhaustion, frustration, etc. It's not a means of belittling problems, but rather, keeping our eye on all the other things in our life that we are happy with and are thankful for.

Favorite New TV Shows

2011-10-08T11:48:00.000-04:00

I was asked on my formspring: "What is your favorite new show on TV these days?"

Well, there are actually a couple new shows that I am into.

~~The Playboy Club~~ (NBC) : I wanted to list it, but there is no need to elaborate since it's already been canceled. :-\

Person of Interest (CBS) : I like the premise. There is a computer program that predicts the identity of people connected to violent crimes that will take place in the future. However, the program has its limitations; it cannot predict whether the person will be a victim, perpetrator, or witness, nor can it predict when or where the crime will take place. So the main character John Reese, played by Jim Caviezel, a former CIA agent is "hired" to track down the people, and stop whatever crime from happening. It's a nice spy type show, which I like, mixed with the fact that you don't know what role the "target" plays in the crime going to be committed so it's kind of a mystery. The only thing I DON'T like about the show is Taraji P. Henson. She just doesn't do it for me in her role, which is a police officer trying to track Jim Caviezel's character.

Charlie's Angels (ABC) : We all know Charlie's Angels. I'm very happy with the casting: having a Black Angel, and having a Latino Bosley. Once again I like the spy show premise. The show uses a really solid formula of get a case, go undercover to crack a case, something goes wrong and drama ensues, solve the case. The only thing that really turns me off about it is the excessive brand name dropping and mentions of shoes. It's like, o.k., we get it, you're women, you like clothes and shoes, but must it be so overt? I'm wondering if the name dropping is actually paid advertising lol.

American Horror Story (FX) : I LOVE this. I've only watched the pilot but I already think it's great. The main premise is a family of three who just moved into a new house...which of course is haunted. I can already tell each episode is going to pack an hour of creepy goodness, and I'm all for that. It's pretty much a good horror movie, that you only get an hour of each week.

New Girl (FOX): This show is HILARIOUS. Zooey Deschanel is beautiful and hilarious. I don't even think any of the other characters are that great, but she SHINES.

What new TV shows are you into this season?

Candyman, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman....

2011-10-07T10:00:00.000-04:00

I was asked on my formspring "What's your favorite movie to watch on Halloween night?"

That is very easy to answer, since I watched it just this past Halloween....CANDYMAN!

Candyman is my favorite horror movie, hands down. Its my favorite because it is probably the scariest horror movie I've ever seen. I lie to you not, just google searching for pictures for this post made my heart beat speed up.

Legend has it that if you say his name five times in a mirror, he will appear. After seeing this movie the first time, I couldn't be in a room with a mirror in the dark for MONTHS, I was 7 years old, now I'm 25 and the movie still creeps me out.

I am pretty sure that the main reason the movie was scarier to me than the likes of Jason or Freddy Kruegger was/is because Candyman is Black. Not that Black men by nature are scary, but Candyman could have been my next door neighbor. While Jason and Freddy were slashing little kids up in the suburbs, Candyman was a descendant of an abused slave killing people in the hood. That hit a little more close to home for me lol.

I think this Halloween I'd like to watch Candyman 2 and 3 over, since I haven't watched them as many times as I've watched the original.

What's your favorite Halloween/Scary movie?

ABCs of Fall: E is for Eagles

2011-10-06T10:00:00.000-04:00

Check out A - D HERE!

With fall comes football season, and when you live in Philadelphia football season means the EAGLES. I thought my husband would be in a much better position than me to give an Eagles post, so this is brought to you by him:

When LaNeshe asked me what E stood for in regards to fall, I said what any red-blooded Philadelphian would say: E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!!! However, at 1-3, I should have said Eggs. Rotten Eggs. Actually, maybe not, cause I would still be talking about the Eagles. Man, what a joke these clowns have been in the first quarter of this year. Andy Reid truly has to be on his last legs with them. How much football angst can Philly take? Take Mike Vick for instance. Love him or Hate him, he's a beast. He takes you to the playoffs relativly easy as a backup. This year you sign him to a huge deal. Surely you're gonna protect with the best line you can get right? WRONG. Most of the O line is comprised of rookies and generally untested guys. It's like getting a deluxe paintjob on a 82 Pinto, pointless. Vick has so far sustained a concussion and a broken hand. And it's only week 5. Also, the playcalling. Atrocious. LeSean Mccoy is a great back, can catch, and can rack up yards on the ground. How does Andy follow a 100+ yard game from Mccoy? By running the ball only 29 percent of the time, in a loss of course. They could have won in Atlanta, and they just totally loss focus against San Fran. These are coaching and general manager problems. My advice? Fire Andy. He's had his turn. I want a coach that will return my Fall to me! Till then....E is for Phillies!

ABCs of Fall: C is for Chai, D is for Decorations

2011-10-03T21:22:00.002-04:00

If you haven't already, check out A & B HERE.

C is for chai! I love a good chai tea latte. In the summer I'll occasionally get an iced chai, but nothing compares to a nice warm cup of chai with just a little bit of foam on the top. I love the spicy, cinnamonly goodness of a chai, I call it "Christmas in a cup" because the aroma and taste remind me of holiday goodness.

D is for decorations! I love a good opportunity to decorate something. Now that the temperatures have dropped a bit, I have changed the theme on my blog and on my twitter to fit the fall feel in the air. Since this will be our first fall in our new house I'm looking forward to decorating for fall/Halloween!

The ABCs of Fall: B is for Boots!

2011-10-02T12:58:00.001-04:00

If you missed it, check out A is for Apple Cider.

When it comes to fall wardrobe, boots are essential! Tall boots, short boots, flat boots,boots with heals. Boots with leggings, boots with tights, boots with dresses, boots with skirts! One thing I've never tried is the boots with tights and shorts look. There is a very small time in the beginning of fall where this can be pulled off before it gets too cold.I'll try it, see how I like it on myself. Here I bring you, gratuitous photos of beautiful boots lol:

What is a staple part of your fall wardrobe?

The ABCs of Fall: A is for Apple Cider!

2011-10-01T20:06:00.000-04:00

I find apple cider to be the PERFECT fall beverage. You can drink it cold, but even better, you can drink it warm, and even better than that, you can drink it warm, with some alcohol added lol. Hot apple cider with some rum makes the perfect "hot toddy" when you are sick in the fall/winter as well.

Here is a recipe for spiked cider from Racheal Ray, very simple and delicious:

Ingredients

2 quarts apple cider
2 cloves
2 cinnamon sticks
4 shots apple brandy
Optional garnishes: Mugs rimmed with sugar, orange twists, freshly grated nutmeg, or whipped cream

Directions

Heat cider with cloves and cinnamon. Pour a shot of apple brandy into a mug and fill with cider.

What's your favorite fall beverage?

Stay tuned for more ABCs of Fall! :-)

Clueless Dads

2011-09-27T17:27:00.000-04:00

One thing I never see is men challenging their portrayal as fathers in the media. This portrayal would be the stereotypical lost father with a young baby.

In the recent episode of Doctor Who the mother went away for rest and the father was left alone with their baby. In the usual fashion the father was shown as clueless. Not only was he clueless, but The Doctor, who is 900+ years old, and has traveled through space and time was also at a loss except for the fact that he could understand "baby," since he understands all languages.

Why don't men challenge the notion that they are clueless when it comes to babies?

Are they actually clueless so there is no need to challenge this? Are women somehow biologically predisposed to know better how to care for a baby than men? Or is it that because of the media's portrayal of taking care of baby being a "woman thing" men take the easy way out in not seeking knowledge or pretending they aren't capable? Is this portrayal completely false, but men don't feel the need to challenge it?

I have to believe that men are just as capable of taking care of a baby as a woman. A first time parent is a first time parent regardless of gender. With the exception of maybe doing a toddlers hair, which a woman has a leg up on from doing her own hair for years, is the playing field not equal?

Furthermore, does the clueless depiction of a father in tern suggest the notion that a first time mother should be all knowing? And what does that do to the to psyche of the first time mother who finds herself behaving more like the stereotypical depiction of the clueless dad? Does she then feel less than as a clueless mother?

I would love some opinions on this, especially from fathers.

"Why God?"and faith

2011-09-18T18:09:00.003-04:00

When things go wrong it can be easy to proclaim "Why, God, why?" The biggest thing about faith is that you have to know that while you may not know the answer to that question, the answer somehow affects the greater good somehow.

I had two family members lately that were let go from their jobs. The initial question of "why?" of course is there, but in the end, I believe both of these people needed to move on in their careers and life, and they had to be forcibly let go, to take their next steps.

No one wants bad things to happen, and we always want someone to blame when bad thing do happen. For persons with faith the key to believing is not wavering, even when you don't know WHY things happen. It's not easy to do, but it is a constant exercise to make faith stronger.

Remembrance

2011-09-17T17:15:00.001-04:00

On two occasions today I was remembered by people and it really made my day.

The first was at the hospital. On the elevator on the way up to visit my grandmother I came across the nurse who was with her on the night back in April when they thought she was going to die. The nurse remembered me and me and my grandpa, and my grandmother, she called her her "miracle lady" and even went up to visit her. She was definitely one of the best nurses my grandmother has had through this whole ordeal and being in multiple facilities. It has been 5 months since my grandmother originally left the hospital and was treated by her, and I'm sure she's seen plenty of patients since then,yet, this woman not only remembered my grandmother and her situation, but the family too. It just made me so happy to know that she cared enough to remember us.

The second was in the grocery store. I ran into the principle of the school I went to from pre-k to 3rd grade and later had a summer job at. She remembered who I was, and that I performed, told me she was proud of me and asked how my grandma was by name. How many students has she had in all these years and she remembered so many specifics about me? Once again, to know that she cared enough to remember so much about me all these years after all her students made me so happy.

People move through life so fast, so often just going through the motions with people, not taking time to listen to them, or care. It was amazing to me that despite how much time has passed or other patients or students, these two women remembered.

Banning Children - fair or discrimination?

2011-09-14T10:08:00.000-04:00

There has been an uptick recently in businesses banning children from their establishments: Malaysia Airlines banned babies from their first class cabins, McDain's Restaurant in Monroeville PA banned children under 6 from their restaurant, and other hotels, movie theaters, etc. are following suit. The question is, is banning children a fair practice on the part of the business owners, or is it discriminatory to families with children?

There are two sides of debate. On one side, you have families who feel like they shouldn't not be able to go to nice places or places at all just because they have children. On the other side, there are businesses who try to keep up a certain atmosphere in their space, and crying or unruly children hamper the experience they try to provide to their customers.

From my personal experience working in performance arts venues, I think it is inappropriate to bring a baby to a live performance. Now, some parents know their children well enough to know if they can sleep or rest quietly through a performance, and if that is the case, then it is fine. But, if you are in a theater with a crying baby, the crying disrupts the experience of the audience and is distracting to the actors. Even with this said, I've never banned anyone from coming into the theater with a child. That has never been the policy of anywhere I've worked.

In movie theaters, or regular restaurants, I don't feel like a crying child is as much of a big deal. However, at an upscale restaurant, where people are paying not only for food but for ambiance, I think it's unfair to everyone involved for that to be broken. My references are pretty much concerning babies up to toddlers about age 3. At age 4 or 5 I think most children know how to be well behaved in public.

Thoughts?

I'd love comments from people on either side of the consumer/parent spectrum, or comments from business owners about their policies.

"Doing it all" - Careerhood PLUS Motherhood

2011-09-12T15:35:00.000-04:00

I've been coming across some interesting discussions on the concept of motherhood and "doing it all" as a result of the new Sarah Jessica Parker movie "I don't know how she does it" and Beyonce's pregnancy announcement. I've noticed a number of women who are mothers comment that there really is no such thing as "doing it all" and that as a mother/wife and a career woman, one side or the other will suffer. This is very interesting to me as I begin to seriously think about when I would like to have children. A comment from xobolaji really stuck out to me:

Women and pregnant women are being sold a bill of goods and those of us who try desperately to live up to the image of a balanced “supermom” fail miserably because you cannot have it all, nor can you do it all. quite simply, most of us lack the resources.

Also, it is virtually impossible to adequately split your time between motherhood and careerhood for the simple reason that one inevitably takes precedence over the other. more often than not, moms tend to "opt out"--it's usually the case that they are driven-out-- of the more high paying positions because it requires that they put the business first. you cannot have a high-paying salary and assume that the CEO is going to be sympathetic to your childcare needs even though most companies are now trying to make it possible for women to sustain their careers. I haven’t even touched on the psychological implications of marketing this unachievable dream to women in general. Recent studies show that women on both sides are depressed because they can’t keep up with the demands of motherhood let alone, careerhood PLUS motherhood.

I think women who are not moms need to set realistic goals/expectations. Even us moms have problems managing. "Doing it all" is a media marketing narrative that isn't supposed to fit real life and so many of us get duped into believing the hype. Moms are starting to share this info more liberally than before. Previously it was a "secret society." Now we're more apt to share.

I wanted another mom given opinion on the topic so I asked my boss. To me, I feel like she does a great job at work and with family, as shown through how awesomely smart and cultured her two children are. Here is her feedback on the topic:

You've asked me about balance between motherhood and career and in my experience as a mother of two, IT DOESN'T EXIST! The moment I let go the ideals of fairness, balance and "achieving it all," was an absolutely freeing epiphany. I've learned the time needed for me to be the type of mother I aspire to be, has forced me to make choices and I've chosen motherhood/family above all else. My children will be young and need my undivided attention for a very short time and before I know it, they will have grown into needing my hands-on attention a little less. I've chosen to work in a family friendly environment and possibly make less money, but I'm able to be "present" physically and emotionally on a daily basis, be it for being active in our school community or having the luxury of sitting down together every night at dinner. I trust that as my children continue to thrive and grow, I will be able to claim more of my own space to explore and achieve my own aspirations.

I've always been one to point out when the media is feeding us unrealistic standards of beauty and lifestyle, but I've never thought about the role the media plays in giving women the illusion that they can "do it all" and how unattainable that really can be. I sometimes struggle with juggling my full-time job, a few side jobs, acting, being a wife and taking care of our dog, I'm sure having a child will make my plate fuller than ever. I appreciate that women can be open and honest about the fact that "balance" is an illusion. Having realistic expectation on what one can really do in the 24 hours they have for each day is so important.

I would LOVE more people's opinions on the topic. Comments please :-)

Online interactions and the illusion of rapport

2011-09-08T10:22:00.002-04:00

I accidentally offended a blogger by asking what they did for a living. It made me think about online interactions and the illusion of rapport.

If you read a blog frequently, watch associated videos, follow on facebook/twitter, leave comments, get comments back, etc. it can give you an illusion of some type or rapport, depending on the blogger, even an illusion of friendship. I think it's natural to develop that effect after investing time into someone's blog for a period of time. For a blogger, I think this is a good thing in most cases. If a person feels connected to you and your blog you are likely doing a good job at reaching your audience.

I guess the caution or pause is this, as a blog reader you should be sensitive to your approach with a blogger as they might not feel as familiar with you as you do with them. As a blogger you should be understanding in that as a person consumes you through a blog, facebook, YouTube, etc they may begin to feel more connected to you than you are with them and ask or do something that you feel has crosses the line.

For me personally, I am greatly appreciative of all those who interact with me here on my blog or on Twitter. I've even got some pretty cool "e friends" over the years. <3 I feel that because I voluntarily but myself out here on the internet through my blog/twitter/tumblr, etc. I have to accept that people will develop opinions (right or wrong) about me, and will approach me with an air of familiarity that may or may not be there on my part.

What has been your experience, if any, with online interactions and mismatched rapport?

The Dilemma of the Single Black Woman

2011-09-06T17:00:00.000-04:00

I was asked on my formspring: It seems that the plight of the single black woman has become the cause of the week in many circles. What is your solution to this dilemma?

Well, it does indeed seem that as of late, everyone from Steve Harvey to CNN wants to chime in on the “plight” that is single Black women and what Black women are doing wrong that is causing them to not be in long term relationships.

I don’t think it is a dilemma. I think the real dilemma is that people are studying this “topic” at all. Where are the articles on single white women? Single Asian women?... You don’t see them. It seems to me as if Black women are being singled out (pun intended) as the only race of women with problems getting into relationship. As a married Black woman, with friends of different races, I can tell you that not all Black women have a problem finding mates, and women of all colors and races have problems finding mates.

I wonder why so many people choose to focus on the topic. And none of the “advice” being given by the people speaking on the issue is very helpful at all. It usually hovers somewhere around Black women being too strong or forceful with men.
What do I think Black women should do to not be single?

First, it must be acknowledged that all Black women (or women in general) do not WANT to be in a relationship and that should be taken into consideration. But, if you are a single Black woman or a single purple woman, or a single green woman, who wants a relationship and is having trouble I suggest:

1. Putting yourself out there to meet new people. You are likely to not meet someone for the potential of a relationship if you only ever travel between your house and work.

2. Don’t listen to most advice. Be YOURSELF when with a guy of interest because YOU are who the person will inevitably be in a relationship with and if you are following magazine rules to get a guy, you’ll either have to keep being a puppet of that magazine to keep him, or lose his interest when he finds you to be someone completely different than the person you were putting on to be.

3. Allow flexibility in your expectations/standards. I’m not saying don’t have any, but don’t let something stupid like promising yourself never to date a guy who wears argyle socks keep you from the man that you could have a meaningful relationship with.

Did you like this post? Share it, tweet it, facebook it, all that good stuff :-D

History of Labor Day, and Out-of-work Force

2011-09-05T20:37:00.000-04:00

Someone asked me on my formspring What does Labor Day mean to you?

I honestly don't think I'd ever thought more of Labor Day than a sign of the end of the summer, and a three day weekend, so I looked it up on Wikipedia to actually see why Labor Day started.

Labor Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the first Monday in September beginning 1894 that celebrates the economic and social contributions of workers.

So then I'm thinking, what made Congress give a federal holiday to the work force? This question led me to information on the Pullman Strike. The Pullman Strike was a nationwide conflict between labor unions and railroads after the Pullman Palace Car Company cut employee wages leading workers to strike, walk off the job, obstruct railroad tracks and threaten and attack strikebreakers. Obviously, the railroad industry was HUGE at this time, and this kind of national disruption of service warranted federal action. US Marshals and Army troops were brought into the situation, leading to deaths and injuries of strikers, and huge amounts of property damage on the part of the ex rail workers. After all of this "drama" ensued President Grover Cleveland and Congress made appeasement of organized labor a top priority. The legislation for the holiday was pushed through Congress six days after the strike ended. Six days...if only legislation could be passed that fast nowadays...

Reading through all of this made me think of the current labor force. We're a long way away from the time when most jobs were trades, and there were a small number of industries a person could get in. The types of work have expanded, but it seems the problems of old still haunt us. Just recently we had the Verizon strike over pensions and health care. And strikes in the sporting industries are also common. Why is that?

Why, is because the workers, the people completely dependent on working for the business of someone else, are always the expense to cut back on when times get tough, and that is unfortunate, but it seems to be the way of business for a very long time. But I suppose looking at it from the other end you have to question, what are businesses suppose to cut, if not people, without making the quality of their product suffer? In some cases, cutting jobs or health care or benefits are the only option left for a business owner, and in others, people are hacked while the top bosses still fly in private jets and walk on oriental rugs.

THIS thought of course made me think of what could help the problem of the unemployed, and that would be... more jobs. I would argue that a huge part of the "not enough jobs" issue is that so many companies in America outsource jobs to other countries for cheaper labor, which does nothing to help the out-of-work force in the US,the people who find Labor Day to be another reminder of their struggle.

Leave a comment, tell a friend, tweet it, facebook it, share it, what have you...

Starting the morning off right

2011-08-25T09:25:00.004-04:00

In the wee hours of the morning, when you are kind of awake but wouldn't dare think of getting out of bed yet, that is when a lot of people worry. I have had many mornings, especially lately, when I'll wake up, lay and bed and worry about my grandma or other things. Joyce Meyer says that first thing in the morning is when the devil tries to grasp your mind.

This morning I was actively determined to not use my peak morning time to stress and worry. Instead, I thought happy thoughts. I pictured the future when my grandmother visits my new house for the first time, and us going on shopping trips. It started off my day much happier than the mornings where I let negative "what ifs" take over my mind.

Tomorrow morning, start your day off with happy thoughts and happy visions, and let those happy vibes carry you through the day.

^^ LOL, remember those from Myspace?

Where was I?

2011-08-24T15:23:00.003-04:00

While to those on the West Coast who are accustomed to the earth quaking, yesterday's East Coast earthquake was negligible, to those of us who have never felt the sensation before, it was a pretty monumental day. I was in a staff meeting at work and we began to feel a rumble under our feet, then the rumble seemed to travel up the walls and to the roof, we then ran outside to find other people on the street standing outside also. This will be one of those "Where were you when...?" events I'll remember.

Some others I'll remember:

Where was I when Aaliyah died? Tomorrow, August 25th is the 10th anniversary of her death. I was on a train on the way from Colorado to Connecticut, and my uncle told me the news as her heard it over the radio. It was definitely sad to hear.

Where was I on 9/11? I was in World Civ class in highschool, and at the beginning of the period our teacher came in and said he saw on the TV in the teacher's lounge that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. At this point it was thought to be an accident. After the period was over, there was an announcement that school was closing and buses were awaiting pick-up outside. I then went home to watch hours upon hours of the footage from all the attacks. It was such a scary and sad day. It felt like the world stopped.

Where were you during key moments in history?

What life do I want to live?

2011-08-22T11:07:00.003-04:00

I often wonder if I am the only person who has a short attention span on what kind of life I want to live. From one day to another I can have a totally different idea on what my ideal day to day life would be.

Some days I want to be a busy working artist, walking around the city with a coffee mug, acting in two shows and promoting another all at the same time.

Some days I want to be a house wife, pop out some babies, clean the house to sparkling and have dinner parties.

Some days I want to be ultra fancy, wearing heels and make up to the grocery store, and partaking in upscale events on a regular basis.

Some days I want a complete work at home existence, being a successful money-making blogger and online personality running podcasts, and dominating social media.

I suppose my "perfect" life is combination of all four mixed with the awesomeness that is my real life now.

Does anyone else picture their "perfect" life differently on a day to day basis? lol

Things I would like to improve in...

2011-08-19T12:40:00.005-04:00

Although it's only August and we are far away from making our New Year's Resolutions, I have some things that I would like to work on in my life.

1. Remember to take food out of the freezer before leaving for work. Food that has defrosted all day in the fridge is much better and quicker to cook than trying to defrost in the microwave when I get home from work and am starving lol. Also, having food waiting at home defrosted lessens the chance that I'll opt for the quick option of fast food instead of cooking.

2. Instill more discipline in my dog. She's just so darn cute! It's hard sometimes to discipline such a cute face lol

3. Conservation. For the purposes of the environment and my utility bills I want to be more diligent in conserving electricity (turning off appliances/lights in rooms I'm not in, remembering to turn of the central air when we leave the house) and water (turning off the tap when I'm brushing my teeth, or letting the shower run forever before I get in it).

What kind of pre-New Years resolutions do you have for yourself?

YouTube Tuesday: "Cry Baby" Cee Lo Green

2011-08-09T10:28:00.002-04:00

This week's YouTube Tuesday is a light one. I figured I'd give you all a break from the heavy posts I've been posting lately. This is Cee Lo Green's "Cry Baby" video. I love that it stars Jaleel White (Steve Urkel), and I love that it is just a nice, feel good, video.

Happy Tuesday.

Overwhelming

2011-08-09T10:09:00.003-04:00

It can be so overwhelming at times to just live. All the news stories of violence, injustice, corruption, neglect of the people, it could drive you crazy if you try to focus on it all at once, or even focus on it at all. All the issues seem so big that you can't begin to think of where to start to make a difference. Not to mention, outside of all the world's problems, an unstable economy, corrupt politicians, and injustices, there is your life, your every day problems. Your family member in the hospital recovering, your bills that can sometimes barely be paid, strife in your personal relationships. It's enough to make a person want to go crazy to figure out what to do.

So, what do you do?

I don't know. Probably the easiest and most manageable thing to do is start with yourself. Help yourself. Try to solve your problems. Then branch out to the people you can immediately touch, the people you can immediately make a difference for. Whether it be supporting a venture they have going, or just giving them an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on.

Start small. You can't solve the world's problems, but you can help those around you and yourself live a happier life.

A Smart Liberal's Opinion on President Obama

2011-08-04T13:54:00.001-04:00

That smart liberal would be my husband :-). (note: he curses, which you usually don't see here lol) This post is courtesy of him, spawned by my question "How do you feel about President Obama right now?"

He tries to make sandcastles out of shit and does ok, yet most people can't see that,

because that takes effort.

I asked: Do you think he should have just held off then used the 14th amendment?

No, because he would have sealed his fate in the upcoming election.

Then I said: I think for his personal campaign for himself, he's pretty much got both sides not liking him, Democracts feel he's a push over and Republicans are just Republicans.

Yeah, people wanna see the world burn, if he would have used the 14th, the US would be screwed, it really wasn't ever a option to be honest. People aren't realizing how much a president can do, that's the problem. He only has so much power, blame these radical teapartiers, they put most of the morons in the house there. You want a better deal on the debt issue? Tough, you voted for gridlock back in 2010.

He wants to raise taxes on the wealthy, he wants to do a bunch of stuff, but he's saddled by maniacs and pro politicians in the house. Liberals need to fall back and read a civics book, then go out and vote the teabaggers out in 2012.

President Obama is in reelect mode, we all see that. This debt ceiling thing was all fabricated,

he even said so. Most of the libs thinking he should have 14th'ed it stop there, they don't think about what that would do to our already fucked up economy. They think he end arounds the process, then it's all good. No, he authorizes the treasury to pay interest first, which is a HUGE amount. There wouldn't be any government services, ssi, medicare, all that would stop until a deal was made, and we all know who gets blamed for shit like that in election cycles, the President. "Obama took my SSI check away."

He's not stupid, he had to make this deal regardless. He's going to win the election, this is exactly what President Clinton did to win after his first term, he had to make his way to the center, and look saner than his rival, which he does now.

You think any of this shit is gonna matter even a month from now, let alone next year? All that's gonna matter is how good or bad the economy looks - then, not even now. Things are messed up now, but if it's on a upswing, he'll win by a landslide again, if not, it'll be a fight, but most likely he'll still probably win. I mean, President Bush. Enough said.

Politics are the worst, you asked how I feel about President Obama, I feels he's being the president, others are let down because he doesn't walk on water.

..... I think I married a smart man, don't you? :-D

The GOP and skewed views on contraception

2011-08-03T15:57:00.007-04:00

Somehow Rep Steve King has become a poster child for pretty much all the things/perspectives that currently irk me in the Republican party's leaders' view on contraception. Thanks to Suggestivetongue for bringing these to my attention. I will use some quotes from him as a spring board to a few things I've been thinking lately:

Preventing babies from being born is not medicine. That’s not — that’s not constructive to our culture and our civilization. If we let our birth rate get down below replacement rate we’re a dying civilization,” King said on the House floor on Monday night.

How in the world does a country flooded with unwanted children constructive to our culture and civilization? Contraception is important to lowering the number of unwanted and neglected children in this world, not to mention allowing couples to actually have family planning and NOT rely on abortions. I can't understand a person who is against abortions and not a proponent of widely spread and available contraceptives. Contraceptives STOP contraception, lowering the number of abortions, does that not make sense?

“We’re $14 trillion in debt and now we’re going to cover birth control, breast pumps, counseling for abuse? Are we going to do pedicures and manicures as well?”

Only a person who has NEVER been a position where they couldn't AFFORD birth control, breast pumps our counseling, could insinuate that these things are as trivial as a manicure and pedicure. THIS IS THE PROBLEM WITH THE PEOPLE IN OUR GOVERNMENT - PRIVILEGE. They don't take the time to understand the position that the majority of the country is in. We are all not living cushy with anything at our grasp. They continue to make cuts to things that affect the majority of people, while safe guarding the funds of the smallest percent of the country - the very rich.

“Having a baby is not the worst thing. I think having multiple sex partners without any kind of restraint or responsibility is much more damning.”

I really wish that this notion of the only people who don't want children are people with thousands of sex partners grabbing people off the streets and throwing them into bed! There are perfectly well adjusted, MARRIED, couples who would like to have some say in when they have children. There are people with children already, who don't have the means to have any more, and use contraception to not have another child.

/end political rant

The hardest thing I've had to deal with

2011-07-25T11:07:00.003-04:00

I was asked on my formspring: What is the hardest thing you've had to deal with?

I would have to say, my grandmother currently being in the hospital. She's been in the hospital for a little over 2 months now after some complications with a surgery. It has been hard, although it has become easier and easier as I have allowed my faith to take control in knowing that God is a healer. Where doctors said she was going to die, He brought forth a miracle.

My grandmother raised me, and this is probably the longest I've gone in my life without speaking to her, on top of the first time I've had worry about her health, AND I'm in Philly, and she's in CT so having the money to go up and visit is hard. Her hospitalization was also a great surprise, because we expected her back home after a week's recovery.

So long story short, dealing with my grandmother being in the hospital has probably been one of the hardest things I've had to deal with in my adult life. She's the rock of our family and everyone who knows her knows she is not one to sit down. I am happy to say that she is getting better. :-)

Here are my grandparents at my wedding in October of '09 :-D

Getting Off Your Beaten Path

2011-07-20T12:21:00.002-04:00

Most of us have a path we travel every day, at least during the week. From home, to work, then back home, and start over the next day. It's important to, when given the opportunity, to do things outside our usual routine. A lot of life can pass you by if you stick to the same path every day. You'd be amazed at the little things you encounter when you step outside your beaten path: run into old friends you haven't seen in a while, get a look a new construction, see new businesses opening up, run across free samples being handed out.

Routine can also be boring. When given the opportunity to mix things up a little, take it, you never know what you'll see or who you'll meet!

I never wanted to grow up

2011-07-15T16:23:00.003-04:00

I never wanted to grow up. I was never the young girl aching to be a teenager. I didn't await for the day I would "become a woman." I read those "learn about your body" type books with huge fear, dreading the day that mother nature's "gift" would visit me. I couldn't understand why anyone would actually WANT 5 days of agony a month. I could care less how fast my boobs would grow.

Even prior to the day when the crimson river began, there was a singular day, that I remember very well, where I was reassured that growing up wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

There we were, my sister and I in the McDonalds play area, sliding down slides, swimming in ball balls...and one of the employees asked me to come out. He made me stand next to the height meter... and I was too tall. He told me I could not return into the play area. I was DEVASTATED. I ran back to my granpa's van and cried while my little sister continued to frolic with tube slides and multi-colored balls. The day still haunts me.

And that was my first introduction to pre-adulthood, rejection from the McDonald's Playplace lol

Now that I am an adult, adulthood isn't that bad, :-)

YouTube Tuesday: Thank You Father For Our Elders

2011-07-12T12:49:00.000-04:00

This weeks YouTube Tuesday is special to me. The poet in this video is a friend of mine Rhythm, who is just a bucket full of awesomeness and beauty. When I watched this video it made me cry. A beautiful poem presented by a beautiful poet.

I am SO grateful for my grandparents. My grandmother has been in the hospital for about two months which makes me realize even more each day how much I am grateful for them. If my grandparents where the only blessing God ever gave me I would still feel HUGELY blessed.

When a Celebrity Can Do No Wrong

2011-07-01T10:55:00.004-04:00

There are two celebrities that have stans (stan = overzealous maniacal fan) that I think we all can agree are ULTRA annoying - that would be Justin Beiber and Queen B herself, Beyonce. I can't say I'm a Justin Beiber fan, but I do like Beyonce, however no where near on the level of some of the people I come across online. To them, Beyonce or Beiber can do no wrong. Everything they spit is hot fire and you better dare not say otherwise. They'll reach through your computer screen and e-slap you lol.

I don't understand it. I don't understand this type of worship of a celebrity. Well, at least, I didn't think I understood it, but then someone compared Beyonce/Bieber to Michael Jackson...... I found myself slip into stan-dom. I found myself thinking "WHAT ARE YOU CRAZY?! NO ONE WILL EVER BE LIKE THE KING OF POP! HE'S THE BEST THING EVER TO HAPPEN TO ENTERTAINMENT. YOU'RE CRAZY!"

At that point I realized, I was a Michael Jackson stan. I mean, I LOVE me some Michael. I don't think anyone else can/will ever compare. I mean, I have answers for every possible criticism of the man -he bleached his skin because of vitiligo and not wanting to look like his father - he'd never touch a child because he didn't have a sexuality and saw them as friends from the childhood he'd never know, the list goes on...

To each his or her own. While we may not be able to understand the Beiber or Beyonce stans of the world I think we all have that one person, place or thing that we stan for, that other people will never quite understand either.

2nd Philly Natural Hair Meet-Up

2011-06-30T09:11:00.002-04:00

Never give up: There are plenty of rings in the sea

2011-06-29T13:19:00.001-04:00

At our first port of call (Grand Turk) during our honeymoon (Oct. '09) my husband and I hit the beach for some swimming. After we got out of the water he looks down at his bare ring finger and says "Oh 'shoot,' my wedding ring!" We sadly walked back to the beach so he could look around the water for it. I'm not a pessimistic person, but I told him to just forget about it. His ring came off in the Atlantic Ocean, what are the chances of finding a ring in the Atlantic Ocean? He went in the water to look, and I laid back in a beach chair to relax.

About 15 minutes later I hear him exclaim "I found it!" and I look up to see him holding the ring in his hand with a smile on his face. He is a very determined man, and that's part of why I love him.

The moral of the story? When something seems impossible, and everyone is telling you to give up... keep pressing on, you can find your ring in the sea.

Genderless: What makes a girl? What makes a boy?

2011-06-28T15:18:00.003-04:00

I read an article about a pre-school that strives to treat the children in a genderless way, no use of the pronouns "she" or "he" or "him" or "her", and no pink vs. blue color schemes. The goal of the school is to allow the children to be who they are, without falling into gender stereotypes. This comes close after the stories broke of the couple who has a genderless baby.

I understand where this comes from, the idea of not forcing children into a rigid gender box of "girls do this, and boys do that." I don't think the problem with society is the fact that there are two gender's, but rather that those two genders have been traditionally squeezed into strict boxes.

Men and women are different. The biology of the bodies between the two are different. There is a difference between the two. We are built with different body parts from one another. Rather than pretend there is no difference between boys and girls/men and women, we should allow more room for what it means to be a part of either group. Why can't boys like pink? Why can't girls play with toy tricks?

It is the constraints that are placed on gender that is the problem, not gender identification itself.

Your Hair Idol Has a Weave

2011-06-22T14:24:00.000-04:00

Many naturals (naturals meaning women who wear their hair natural without chemically processing it), myself included, have a habit of looking at pictures of other naturals online for hair inspiration. A majority of my tumblr is women with natural hair.

I would like to caution all the naturals out there that the hair you may be trying to emulate on your hair idol may be a weave. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with weaves, or that naturals shouldn't look at photos for inspiration, but you must be very careful that you aren't trying to obtain a look with your hair that is really faux on someone elses.

The natural hair blogosphere is always raving about Solange. I like Solange, her hair and her style are quite usually on point. But, as you can see from the photos below, taken within days of each other, her hair is not always the hair grown out of her head.

I guarantee you there are women who saw the picture to the right and thought "darn, how come my hair isn't growing as fast as Solange?" or "how come I can't get my fro' like that?" To a natural who hasn't yet gained enough confidence, or a new natural, this can be discouraging.

My caution to all my natural hair junkies out there is to be careful not to completely idolize someone else's hair, because they may be working with more than what's coming out of their roots. Work on making your hair the best it can be, not trying to make it look like someone else's.

YouTube Tuesday: Friends Don't Let Friends : The Tragedy of Amy Winehouse

2011-06-21T12:11:00.000-04:00

It's been a while since I posted a YouTube Tuesday, so here we go:

This is a video from Amy Winehouse's Comeback Tour. She's been battling substance abuse and mental health issues in the public it seems since she first came on to the scene. The video is tragic, and shows that she still needs help, even after checking in and checking out of rehab. She is clearly not all together on that stage, at all.

This is such a sad display. A lot of people commenting on the video on YouTube and other blogs where asking how could her management and family let her live like that, let alone let her get on stage like that? That begs the questions, at what point do you let someone go and make their own mistakes? She is an adult woman. From what I read her father had checked her into rehab, and she checked herself out shortly after. Is there anyone to blame for her state but herself? How much responsibility must loved ones take in the lives of the people they care for? As an artist, shouldn't her management be concerned about putting out a good artistic product even if they don't care about her personally?

On a smaller scale it's kind of like when a group of adult friends are out at a club, and one friend has gotten fall-over-on-her-face drunk. Is it the other friend's responsibility to monitor and censor their drunk friend, or because of their age should the person be responsible for themselves?

Just some thoughts, feel free to comment how you feel about the issue!

Hot vs. Beautiful

2011-06-20T12:43:00.004-04:00

I found myself intrigued over the weekend when I saw a commercial for the 2011 Miss USA pageant and the contestants were referenced as "The hottest women in America" vs. something like "the most beautiful."

It is the Miss USA pageant, so things are about looks, so I wouldn't expect the announcer to call them "the most intelligent women in American" (even though they are likely very intelligent) but I didn't expect them to be called "hot."

I suppose it is the connotations of the words hot/sexy vs. beautiful. To me describing a woman as "hot" is making mention of her aesthetic quality related to something of a sexual nature, while "beautiful" is somehow a more wholesome note of aesthetic attractiveness.

From my experience there is definitely a difference in the way a woman perceives a compliment if a man calls her sexy/hot vs. a man calling her beautiful.

Women, would you rather be called sexy/hot or beautiful?
To all those who find women attractive, what is the difference between "hot" and "beautiful" to you?

By the way, I have a photoblog: The Beauty of Women that showcases what I consider beautiful women.

image source

The less you have, the more you use

2011-06-19T09:22:00.001-04:00

First let me say that the hubby and I are comfortably living in our new home. :-D

What I noticed when I was packing was that I have a LOT of stuff, so much stuff that there were literally things (clothes, shoes, jewelry, kitchen gadgets, etc) that I hadn't touched in the two years we lived in the last place. I started to think about the fact that if I had less stuff, i'd have more of a handle on what I had, and would actually use/wear those things more.

I think the same philosophy can be attributed to a few things. One is friendships, both "real" friendships and online relationships. The smaller your group of friends, the more you are able to keep up with and actually engage with them. This is probably why many people would rather have a small amount of really good friends rather than a myriad of acquaintances.

I guess the saying 'Less is More' really does make sense. In some cases, the less you have, the more you can appreciate and utilize what you have.

"Marvin's Room " & Disrepect for Relationships

2011-06-09T15:08:00.004-04:00

Shall I start by saying that I am generally a mild Drake fan? Now that that is out of the way...

He released a song today, "Marvin's Room." I strongly dislike it for multiple reasons. He's "singing" for the majority of the song, and the lyrics/story are horrible to me. I seem to be the only one, on Twitter I've seen such comments as "Best song of 2011" and "This is real music." -- to each his/her own I suppose.

The gist of the story is Drake is drunk, so he's calling some girl that he knows is with a good man and making a play for her. Some lyrics:

Cups of the Rose
Bitches in my old phone
I should call one and go home
I’ve been in this club too long
The woman that I would try
Is happy with a good guy

But I’ve been drinking so much
That I’ma call her anyway and say
“F-ck that nigga that you love so bad
I know you still think about the times we had”
I say “f-ck that nigga that you think you found
And since you picked up I know he’s not around”

:-\ I dunno. I guess as a happily married woman I'm not really feeling the "get drunk and break up someone's relationship" tone of this. I'm confused as to who is out there LOVING this song? Is it people interested in a person already in a relationship? Are those the people that have it on repeate? What is it that has everyone loving this so much that it's trending on twitter?

This plays into a greater issue which is disrepect for relationships. Is no one's relationship sacred if there is someone out there who think they might be better? I'm currently going through the whole series of "The L Word" and although I'm only through about 1 and a quarter seasons, but I've noticed a trend of "I think I'm better than her current girlfriend so I'm just gonna go in for the kill." I see this on TV all the time. Is there no relationship off limits?

Slideshow from the Philly Natural Hair Meet-Up

2011-05-29T12:31:00.002-04:00

TV Show Graveyard

2011-05-25T09:40:00.003-04:00

Losing a good TV show hurts sometimes. You become engrossed in the story, and begin to care for the characters, and then BAM... the show is canceled. There are a few scenarios when it comes to show cancellations:

1.The show is canceled while in the middle of the current season, which usually makes continuing to watch the show bitter sweet. It's like reading a book that you know will never have a real ending. It also seems like writers give up on a show once its canceled, and the remaining episodes just aren't good anymore.

2. The show is canceled after the season finale, before another season airs. This usually leaves you with the feeling of never really getting to say goodbye. Questions that you thought would be answered in the next season will forever go unanswered.

Here is my TV Show Graveyard:

Chicago Code

I really liked this show. I don't think it was given a fair chance! It didn't even get one complete season before they axed it!

United States of Tara

This was part of my Shotime double header, the other half being Nurse Jackie which was thankfully not canceled. I LOVED this show. I think Toni Collete does a GREAT job of portraying all the parts of Tara. I will admit that I was starting to wonder where the show could possibly go at this point, so maybe it is for the best that they are ending it, before it "jumps the shark." There are two episodes left, and from the way things are going, I think audiences might get an actual close to the story before it goes off air.

Flash Forward

This was another show that I felt didn't get a fair shot. I was really invested in the storyline and the characters, only to really be left hanging when the season finale came around, and I could never more forward with the story. I really hope maybe one day the Sci-Fi channel will pick it up and continue it.

Lights Out

Another show that only got one season. I'm not even a boxing fan, but I was TOTALLY invested in the story and the characters. At least with this show I feel like I did get a season finale that actually gave me closure.

What TV shows do you think were pre-maturely canceled?

Protective Styles

2011-05-24T09:04:00.004-04:00

I was asked on my formspring: Do you have any suggestions of protective styles other than twist outs and braid outs?

First I should say that I don't consider twist outs or braid outs to be protective styles since the ends of the hair are out, and the hair is loose and can tangle. To me a protective style keeps the ends away, and decreases the chance of tangles. Protective styles I like are:

1. Buns

2. Two-strand twists: These can be mini twists, medium sized twists, or even large twists that you can pin up or leave out in a style. I like to do medium sized twists and set them on rollers.

3. Roll-tuck-and pin: This is really quick and easy. Essentially you roll and tuck the hair, pinning as you go. No tangles, and the ends are protected. HERE are good pictures of various roll-tuck and pin styles on Google. And below is a video from Jenelle of Kinky Curly Coily Me! (one of my favorite natural hair blogger/vloggers.)

Are All Politicians Doomed for Corruption?

2011-05-19T17:42:00.001-04:00

I’ve seen it time and time again on countless shows: The Wire, The Borgias, Chicago Code, etc. etc.

A politician starts off with the greatest of intentions, wanting to genuinely help people and through one way or another they end up giving in to corruption. A few different things tend to happen:

1. They end up getting into bed with one criminal group (i.e. Irish mob) in order to have protection for it’s constituents from another criminal group (i.e. Bloods). The thought is keeping the people safe warrants siding with the bad guys to go against even badder guys.

2. They end up having to sell their soul and values in order to get elected, with the idea that once they get elected they can really help the people. In order to get rid of the incumbent corrupt politician they likely end up being just as corrupt.

3. Once they get in office they face resistance from other “seasoned” politicians in making any change, and can’t effectively keep their campaign promises, not because they don’t want to, but because they literally can’t get past the brick walls of other politicians and special interests.

4. They end up in a situation where they don’t have the funds to support the plans they have to help people and better society, and end up in debt to special interest groups and businesses that then are able to use their purse strings as puppet strings, negatively informing political policy.

I can’t help but think that these situations I constantly see arise in television shows reflect what truly happens in politics. People often say that all politicians are corrupt, but I genuinely don’t think they start out like that. I believe there are people who really want to help the people, who get into politics, and find themselves doing things they’ve never thought they would do.

What is the remedy to this? How do we clean up politics?

Pitbulls, Racists and “Just Knowing”

2011-05-16T13:28:00.004-04:00

This woke me up this morning and has been swirling around my head angering me all day so I figures perhaps if I wrote it out in a blog post, I could get it out of my system and move on.

My husband and I have known since we first moved into the condo complex where we live almost two years ago that we were Black, and that made us stand out a bit. There have always been small things here and there that seemed to only be a problem when WE did it. Us having a second car parked in the parking lot without moving for a long time caused angry letters to the condo association, while people who don’t even live in the condo park in our lot everyday and hop on the train to work with no repercussions. There have always been little things that others thought must be brought up with the condo association.... never spoken about to us.... and we’d receive a letter explaining what our latest offense was. I’ll be honest, the bottom line in all of it to me, is that we were living while Black in a white condo.

The latest “offense” is us getting a dog, but not just any dog, a pit-bull. Her name is Sunny and she is sweet as can be, but the big scary couple with the pit-bull has already been reported to the condo association before Sunny has even been with us for a week. Apparently complaints were made about the 4 year old pit-bull in the complex (although Sunny is only 1.5 years old). We’ve also heard the ‘neighborly’ “You know we clean up after our dogs here, right?” as if a normal human being wouldn’t think to pick up their dog’s poop.

Regarding the ordeal my husband aptly tweeted: Pit Bulls are helpless victims when Mike Vick is fighting them, but vicious dogs when you're walking them around racist white people.#gotit

“But LaNeshe, how do you know these reports were based on your race?” The answer is, you just know. You can tell when you aren’t welcomed, and can deduce what the reason is for ill hospitality. I really thought moving to the suburbs from South Philly would find us in a warm neighborhood of warm, neighborly and happy people.... Didn’t happen. But that’s o.k. We are moving in the middle of June to a new house, OUR HOUSE that we’ve bought, with neighbors we’ve met who have already offered my husband a spot in their “beer drinking and marshmallow roasting sheds.”

This whole ordeal reminds me of my last most memorable racist encounter:

June 14th, 2008. Today at 8:09 a.m. Tim and I were waiting in a parking lot on Ellsworth and Federal for our Philly Car Share car. A woman, a white woman, was walking her dog, picking her car up from the parking lot. After staring at us the whole way into the lot she asked “What are you doing here?” The fear and hate in her face, and the tone of her voice was as if she expected the answer to be “stealing a car,” “robbing you,” or “selling drugs.” All we were doing was sitting in the parking lot waiting for our car. What gave her the right, and what prompted her to question our being there, four blocks from our house? I am 99% sure that if we had not been a Black couple she would have proceeded on with her day, with no questions asked. Tim said we did a service to Black people by answering her questions politely and not being rude in a situation where we were obviously being treated unfairly. I hope that that is true, I hope the next time she won’t find a Black couple sitting and talking in a parking lot to be suspicious.

I am fortunate enough to be in a place in life for the most part where I don’t encounter too many racist individuals (aside from the Internet) so when I find myself in situations where I know I am being judged on the basis of my skin color, it stings, a lot.

This is Sunny Buckets, she'll lick you to death, but that's about all :-)

Philly Natural Hair Meet-Up

2011-05-13T19:55:00.002-04:00

You can comment below to RSVP! Bring a dish to share, and hair product(s) for the product swap!

I don't have to like it because he's Black

2011-05-13T12:52:00.000-04:00

There seems to be a misconception that Black people should support the art of other Black people, simply because they are Black.

Every time a discussion of Tyler Perry films comes up someone will say that it is horrible that Black people don’t support him because he is a Black filmmaker providing jobs for Black people in front of and behind the camera.

When Beyonce’s “Girls Who Run the World” single came out and many women (Black and White) didn’t like it I saw on many blogs people say things like Black women should support her as a Black woman instead of tearing her down.

I don’t have to support art that I don’t like from Black artists just because they are Black. That is absurd. I don’t dislike Tyler Perry films because he’s Black, I dislike them because I think they are bad films. Disliking a Beyonce song is not “another case of Black women tearing each other down,” it is a case of not liking a song because it doesn’t appeal to me.

If you are a supporter of supporting Black art then I think you do a disservice to artists if you allow them to put out product of a low quality and accept it as gold just because they are Black.

I like/dislike and critique artists from the same perspective, regardless of their color. There is no “handicap” given to them winning my opinion because they look like me.

If you are in Philly and want to support what I would say is GOOD Black art, Check out Marc Bamuthi Joseph’s “Word Becomes Flesh”

What used to be

2011-04-27T14:58:00.001-04:00

There was a thunderstorm today that made me think of you
What could have been, what hasn’t been, what should have been
What used to be

Friendship is a funny thing
In the throes of laughter and good times you never imagine
Years later when calls will be ignored
Years later when affinity becomes awkwardness

When not even a Facebook poke remains between us I still remember
What used to be

YouTube Tuesday: Lil Buck and Yo-Yo Ma

2011-04-19T10:22:00.001-04:00

Today's YouTube Tuesday is touching to me. See below street dancer Lil Buck dancing to the music of famed cellist Yo-Yo Ma. I just really enjoy the convergence of art-forms in general, and to bring a hip-hop dance form together with the cello just makes me smile. The piece is an interpretation of “The Dying Swan” from Camille Saint-Saëns’ Carnival of the Animals. Happy Tuesday! :-D

Rewarded for doing what's right?

2011-04-11T13:06:00.002-04:00

He's a good man, he doesn't cheat on his woman.

Rewards for children who get A's and B's on their report card.

Pizza party for the students who get perfect attendance.

It occurred to me today that we as a society are in the habit of rewarding people just for doing what is right. A man who doesn't cheat on his woman shouldn't be anything special, that should be the standard, no reward needed. A child gets ice-cream for achieving A's and B's on a report card, but that isn't excellent (meaning, excelling past the norm) that is just normal, or at least it SHOULD be.

The problem is that we have let less-than good become the standard in so many arenas. This promotes the idea that just doing good means you are "doing something."

Prizes should be handed out for individuals that exceed good. Pizza parties should be for students who voluntarily stay after school for extra study, not those who come to school everyday as they should. If this were the case, people would excel, they would work to do great, knowing that good is what is expected. This would raise the bar of life.

Strive to be an A+, A's and B's are just par.

Stylish Blogger Awards

2011-04-07T08:43:00.006-04:00

A huge thank you to L of NaturalReviewByL for giving me the Stylish Blogger Award. Her blog is an EXCELLENT resource for those seeking information on natural hair, and over all healthy living.

To accept the award, you must follow these rules:

1. Thank and link back to the person that awarded you this award
2. Share 7 things about yourself
3. Award 15 recently discovered great bloggers
4. Contact these bloggers and tell them about the award

Seven things about me:

1. I LOVE to perform (act and dance).
2. I've been skydiving.
3. I graduated from Temple University
4. I don't believe in dentists (I believe in good dental health, but I think dentists give people problems with their teeth lol).
5. I am a HUGE Michael Jackson fan.
6. I am married to an AWESOME man.
7. I love video games.

Here are the 15 bloggers I'd like to give the Stylish Blogger Award (please check them out, they are all great blogs):

Ronnica of The Ignorant Historian (a general great blog about life, books, faith, and humor)

Miss Lynn of Thoughts of a Randomista (a general blog, but not for the faint of heart lol. She gets into the nitty gritty with no apologies)

Kiianah of Natural Becomes Her (great natural hair blog)

Naturalness (a great natural hair blog, that has an AWESOME web comic series on natural hair created by using The Sims)

Jamila of College Curlies (natural hair blog, one of my favorites)

Monique of Sofull Sista (great blog on food, hair, and style)

Lo of Suggestivetongue (sex and sexuality blogger, she pulls no punches)

Trevhamm.com (great faith/spirituality blog)

Socialite Dreams Blog (life, fashion, hair and life - has a wonderful Wednesday series, Hump Day-Hotties)

Natural Belle (hair and fashion)

Brandi (great tumblr blog - photos, poetry, everything)

Alex of The Good Hair Blog (great natural hair blog, she also has a hair product line)

Pretty Natural Divas (great natural hair blog, and they have nice merchandise)

L of Natural Review by L (another great natural hair blog *who gave me this award*)

^^^visit those blogs, they are awesome and deserving of the Stylish Blogger Award.

At what point do you have to accept that you are...strange?

2011-04-06T10:27:00.002-04:00

I’ve seen a lot of comments around the internet on the “Teacher makes fun of student with Jolly Rancher’s in her hair on Facebook” story that go something like: Although the teacher had no right to put the girl’s photo on Facebook and make fun of it, why would a mother put candy in her child’s hair and not expect ridicule, at the least from other students?

Similarly, a recent episode of “How do I look?” featured this woman:

Her family put her on the show, because her outfits, which always contained one OR MORE tu-tus were embarrassing to them out in public, and were hindering her aspirations as a make-up/fashion designer.

My husband and I debated her need for a makeover. I said, yes, she needed one, a tu-tu is a costume, and while I love eccentricity, she was crossing the line into strange. He felt like her family should be ashamed of themselves for trying to push their style on to her, and not accepting her how she was.

These scenarios beg the questions: At what point do you have to accept that you are going to be considered odd?

Being eccentric is fine, and not caring about what others think is fine, but at what point do you have to anticipate negative reaction?

I am sure that there are some people who would say that because I where my hair natural I should EXPECT odd stares on the street at my ‘fro.

In a perfect would, it wouldn’t matter, it shouldn’t matter, what a person’s outside appearance is and how they dress or wear their hair, but in the real world, it does matter. Accepting that, and dressing out of the norm is fine, but if you’re wearing three tu-tus are you allowed to be offended if someone points, laughs or stares?

Bad Facebook Behavior

2011-04-05T15:01:00.000-04:00

There have been two recent cases of teachers badly depicting their students on Facebook. In one instance, a teacher posted a picture of one her students wearing Jolly Rancher candies in her hair, and led her Facebook friends in mocking the photo. {source}

The second incident was a teacher who called her students (6-8 years old) “future criminals.” on her Facebook page. {source}

While I don’t think these teachers should have posted these things on their Facebook pages, the fact remains, that Facebook or not, they had these feelings towards their students. In the pre-Facebook age, maybe they would have printed the photo and snickered at it over brunch on a Saturday afternoon, or just complained to their friends about the delinquent 7 years olds in their class... either way, the feelings are still there.

That’s the things about the internet, it doesn’t MAKE any one racist, insensitive, rude, or dumb...it just offers them a platform to express those less than stellar qualities about themselves.

The issue really seems to be answering the question of why is it that the force spending the most time with our children have thoughts that align with tearing children down, rather than building them up? Are they in a career they don’t want? Is it become they are underpaid? What is it?

I’m highly uncomfortable with a teacher who predicts a 6 year old is a future criminal. A teacher should be trying to mold young children into future leaders, not chalking their lives up to the world of crime.

Much praise to teachers who despite never getting the recognition/pay they deserve, still seek to do their jobs to the best of their ability, both in the classroom, behind closed doors, and on Facebook.

Note: I really only take a problem with ill Facebook behaviour that has to do with students. If a teacher wants to go clubbin’ on a Saturday night and post pictures holding three drinks, and doing a split in the club, I take no issue, because that has nothing to do with her professional life.... unless she has students as friends on Facebook.... or in the club with her lol

I am a Woman

2011-03-23T20:07:00.002-04:00

I am a woman. I am kind, nurturing, and caring. I am feminine, yet strong. I am beautiful. I am fierce. I am determined. I am sexy.

I am a woman. Which means that 7 days out of the month I am a woman on her period, or a woman about to be on her period. This means my hormones are going bazurk, I feel like I'm huge, my uterus hurts, my back hurts, my head hurts, chocolate is my new best friend, I am starving- but I have no appetite, and not to mention, I am bleeding from my nether-regions. This is what you can do to support me during this time:

1-Do not mention my period: Yes, I may be on my period, or about to start it, so I do NOT need you to suggest "are you on your period?" or "is you're period coming?" If it is, I'm likely to hit you. If its not, I'm likely to hit you for suggesting it is.

2-Be nice: Extra nice! I'm probably feeling the worst I've felt since 28 days earlier. You don't have to wait on me hand and foot, but perhaps ask if I need anything, or if there is anything you can do for me. Yes, this comes every month, but it doesn't get any easier to deal with.

3-Don't laugh: Cramps HURT, and at times it takes some weird body positions to get any relief. Whether I am doubled over in fetal position or standing on my head you better not laugh!

4-Leave me alone: If I have no other obligation in the day, I want to sleep. If you have already completed step 2 of these instructions, your job is done, unless otherwise specified. No need for any more attention unless I ask for it. Let me sleep. The best part of the day when I am on my period is the time when I am not awake.

5-Hold me: No, this does not contradict number 4. This is where the unless otherwise specified comes in. If I call you into the room, or ask you to hold/hug me, hold me for a little while, give me a little kiss on the cheek or forehead, rub my tummy, etc . Once again, this is if your presence is requested, if not, just stick with number 4.

:-D