What is the worst thing you have lived through?

I was asked on formspring What is the worst thing you have lived through?

I think one of the worst things if not the worst thing I’ve lived through is the loss of my friend Lynn. She was shot and killed when we were only 20 years old. She was my girl. We’d been friends since 4th grade. It was so sudden. They still don’t know who killed her and she was the first person I’d ever lost to death.

I’ve never felt so helpless. The day I found out it felt like I cried all day. I think I did cry all day. It was so hard to understand the finality of death. I could not fathom never seeing her again, never seeing her smile again. I had a long time where I was just really hurting inside. My heart literally hurt. It still does. It’s still hard, I’ll have a day when I just randomly think of her and I break down crying.

She was my first funeral. All those young people mourning the loss of such a young girl. It was so sad. It is so sad. I expected her to be with me to grow up, to be at my wedding, to live past 20.

I think I’ll stop this entry here because it’s making me sad. But to answer the question, the worst thing I’ve lived through is experiencing my first death, losing my friend Lynn.


  1. thats hella fu%ked!
    im so sorry this has happened 2 ya' =/ ...

  2. @Barloga - definitely one of the many unfair parts of life.

  3. so sad, she is so pretty too.

    I'm sorry you had to go through this. they are still looking for the person who murdered my cousin.

    i hope they got what was coming to them though.

  4. @Brittany - on TV it seems like people are killed, evidence is found, and the killers get what they deserve. But too often are people we love killed in real life and their killers never found.

  5. [hug]
    I'm still getting over a friend's death, too. Just looking through her pictures makes me sad all over again. She wasn't the first death experience I had, but the first that hurt because I was too young to realize the others.

    We'll see our friends again, someday, eh?

  6. @Thu - indeed, we will see them again.

  7. I can't imagine how hard it would be to lose a friend like that at such a young age. That's so tragic.

  8. It was so unfair to lose such a wonderful person. She was always smiling, I'll never forget that about her. She was so sweet, genuine and just awesome. One of the nicest people I had ever met. But at least she is in a better place, no matter how cliche that may sound.

  9. @Jason - she was easily the nicest person I've ever met.


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