8/1/10 - 9/1/10 | NESHEAHOLIC

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Have you ever felt like an outcast?

Another formspring question: Have you ever felt like an outcast?

When you are the different one in a group of people you can either let that make you feel special, or make you feel bad. When I was younger I was very often the "different" one. I would be the only black person in various activities (soccer, gymnastics, etc.) even if my color was never referenced, I knew I was different, and everyone else knew I was different. Not in that I achieved any greater or any worse at the activity, but it was just that whole hockey puck on a sheet of ice effect...(stop, think, you'll get the joke in a minute lol).

So, did this difference make me feel special or like an outcast? I always felt pretty special lol. My color has never put me in a position to feel ashamed or like an outcast....but my breasts have. I didn't always have big boobs, they sprung up about freshman year of high school. I had to get custom made bras for dance recitals because the back-less/strapless/clothless tops weren't really made for my growing into 36DDs. No cute little tops for LaNeshe, I ALWAYS have to wear a bra. From the moment my mole hills began to sprout into small mountains every performance after that has been a constant conversation of "how will I wear a bra with that?” “Are my breasts staying in place?”

In my mind I am always the big breasted girl on stage. Don't get me wrong, I'm cool with my breasts, but they can be a hindrance sometimes when it comes to performing, especially if I’m on stage with smaller framed women. I prefer that they stay in place like two good little girls if I'm acting or dancing. I don't want them overshadowing my performance.

I had a show last year where I played a nine year old girl. We figured out early on that my chest was in no way the chest of a nine year old. Our remedy to that was wrapping "the girls" down tight with two ace bandages.

So I went from 36DD


To about 36 -A


Besides the uncomfortableness that two ace bandages wrapped around your lungs brings, it felt great :-P
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Monday, August 30, 2010

Dream Vacation

I was asked via formspring: What’s your idea of a dream vacation?

Definitely a cruise.

We did a 5 day cruise for our honeymoon and it was great. Cruises incorporate all the great elements of a great vacation:

-Multi-locations without the worry of transportation
-Hotel room feel (room service!)
-Beaches
-Activities or excursions, on shore
-Great food
-The ability to be social if you want, or be hermits if you want

We’re going on a 7 day cruise in December, and I can’t wait!
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I met a guy

Last week I met a guy. I didn’t realize it until I met him face to face that I had never actually met him. He’s a business contact, and we’ve communicated solely via e-mail for more than a year. I trust him with charges to my organization, having (before last week) never met him or even spoke with him on the phone.

The Internet is an interesting thing. It allows us to communicate with people and build a connection, without ever meeting them. I have become acquainted with many people through blogging who I feel connected to, and would consider friends, even though I’ve never met them, and probably never will.

Gone are the times when we never used our real name online. Now, the standard e-mail address is firstname.lastname@gmail.com. As time has gone on since the internet has become available to more people, we have become more and more comfortable with the internet, and therefore more and more comfortable with communicating with, and trusting people over the internet. Funny how things change.
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Thursday, August 26, 2010

Letting Go

I was asked on formspring: How do you know you need to let something go in your life? and similarly, What is the best way of letting go?

This is a good question for me. In the past I’ve had a history of holding on to people, places, and things, longer than what was beneficial for me. I get a sentimental attachment that blinds me from what really needs to be done. How do you know when you need to let something go? When that something is no longer beneficial to you in the way it once was, it is time to let go. This can be hard because you can be holding onto relationships, jobs, etc. for what they once were to you. As time goes on things change and in order to grow in life some things have to be let go of when they no longer have the value they once had, or the value you need.

This can definitely be hard when it comes to relationships, both romantic and friendships. Sometimes this can be equally as hard when it comes to a job, or a volunteer commitment. I think you should treat anything that takes your time as if it was a person. If you wouldn’t stay in a relationship with a person who no longer valued you or who didn’t give you the treatment you deserved, then you shouldn’t take that kind of treatment from a job or any other time commitment.

What is the best way of letting go? This might seem too simple, but just let go. That initial severing of ties is going to be important, but if you have decided that a person, place, or thing isn’t worth the time spent with it, then just cutting the cord is what you have to do. Cutting the cord and keeping it cut. Wavering back and forth isn’t fair on whatever it is you must leave behind, and it certainly isn’t beneficial for you.
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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I am the perfect wife

Before you jump through the screen yelling “What makes you the perfect wife?!” What I mean is, I am the perfect wife...for my husband. I am not a perfect wife. I, like everyone else, have my shortcomings. But I do think I must have been crafted for my husband in particular. He needs a wife who is caring, compassionate, and all that, ...but he also needs a wife who sees the same value in good TV shows, and who can run his lower level World of Warcraft character through a dungeon with her 59 Undead Rogue. -- that my friends, is ME.

I, on the other hand, need a husband who even though he hates sitting in the front row at a theater, he will sit in the front row if I’m in the show. I also need a husband with an open mind towards the arts --that is my husband.

The point I am trying to make is that so many people are looking for “the perfect man” or “the perfect woman” when really they should be looking for the perfect mate for them. Forget societal standards of what a wife should be, or the notion of the perfect man perceived through chick-flicks. Think about yourself. Think about what you need. You are the only person who will have to live the rest of your days with that person - not your friends, not the movies, and not TV or Internet dating advice blogs.
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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

YouTube Tuesday: Hide yo kids, hide yo wife

Welcome to this week's YouTube Tuesday, where I pick a YouTube video that has intrigued me and showcase it. Now, I tried to stay away from this one, I really did. This whole thing should not be funny. I'm referring to the Antione Dodson YouTube phenomenon.

Brief background for those who haven't run across this story on the internet: Antoine Dodson's sister was attacked in their home. A news crew got a "colorful" message from him directed at the attacker.

This shouldn't be funny because:

1. The whole thing started by Antoine's sister being attacked, which is not funny.
2. The news station was wrong for exploiting Antoine and his sister by showing what was obviously not a very nice display of them.
3. The internet is even more wrong for exploiting the video via many YouTube remixes.

Now, those are reason why this video shouldn't be funny...but it is funny! I have to give kudos for the craftsmanship of this video, I just have to. But I don't want to belittle what was obviously a serious situation for Antoine and his sister.

Here you are - the best "Bed Intruder Song," which is also available on iTunes and has been covered by the media as extensively as NPR (that link also has the original interview with Dodson).




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Sunday, August 15, 2010

In trouble with the law

I was asked on formspring : What's the most trouble you've gotten in with the law?

I've never really had any real run ins with the "The Law." Both of my short tales oddly enough have to do with over zealous school security.

The first scenario took place in high-school. Myself, and my friends Dominique and Lynn were hanging by the bathroom during classes one day. Some security guards come up to us and accused us of being some notorious group of bathroom vandals. They put us against the wall and searched us. My friend Dominique had a Sharpie on her, which made her enemy number one. How dare she have a marker in SCHOOL?! I had two Swiss Army knives on me which were confiscated. For those who don't know, my mother works for Swiss Army Inc. so I generally have at least two pocket knives on me at all times lol. Nothing really happened from this incident, other than being completely embarrassed by being searched in the hallway, and my angry grandmother having to come pick up the confiscated pocket knives.

The second scenario happened during the time I was in high school, but at my elementary school. Myself, and once again Dominique and Lynn went by our old elementary school to visit old teachers close to the end of the day. The school security guards saw us in the hallway and said that we had to leave and were trespassing. We argued a little bit, they said they would call the police if we didn't leave, so we just left. I find it sad that an elementary school would kick out students who graduated from it.

Btw, after I graduated college they wanted me to give the graduation speech to the 8th grade class lol

And that is the extent of my run-ins with the law.
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Saturday, August 14, 2010

Ending the Summer

Since I'm not in school anymore there isn't a definitive break between summer and fall based on when classes start. Because of this I pretty much have to arbitrarily choose a point where I say, "OK, now I am preparing for fall."

I chose this weekend as my point between summer and fall. Time to get down to business. Not that I haven't been taking care of business all summer long, but work is about to pick up as our fall production season starts, and rehearsals are about to start for a show I'm in in September - October.

What did I do to symbolically end the summer? The hubby and I went to Dorney Park!!

One of the very many reasons why I love my husband is his ability to win me large stuffed animals at amusement parks. Here is yesterday's ski-ball conquest:



You could not imagine the strange way people look at you when you leave an amusement park with a large cow lol. There was also this guy who was ski-balling in the lane next to us, and when we were walking away with our giant cow (and little pig) his girlfriend said something like "Wow, look at that!" and the guy replied "It's all dirty." I'd say he was a hater, his girl was walking away with $10 less and no stuffed animals :-P

I also conquered my fears of roller coasters that go upside down:




What do you do to celebrate the end of summer?
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Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Why can't I just be happy?

A lot of people find themselves in tough situations in life questioning: Why can’t I just be happy?

Happiness isn’t always passive, sometimes you have to aggressively fight for it. It is great when all of life’s puzzle pieces come together, but things aren’t always perfect. Sometimes it’s not easy to be happy - those are the times you have to fight for it. Sometimes you have to fight to be happy in-spite of, or despite imperfect situations in life. Sometimes it can be hard to smile or think a good thought when everything seems to have gone awry, but isn’t happiness worth fighting for?

Sometimes you can't just be happy, at those times, I say fight for happiness. Resolve today that you will hold onto your happiness, even if it takes effort. You'll have better days that way :-)
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Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Natural hair makes you unique?

I read this post by Natural Urbanista the other day about recording artist Laura Izibor. She was recently seen on the red carpet with sleek straight care as compared to her curly look of previous.

Usually:











Recently:




















Two of the comments on that post stuck out to me:

"I like it natural too, sorry but she looks less unique with the straight 'do." and

"Wow, now she looks like everyone else in Hollywood. That's not a good thing!!! "

Then today I read this post over at Black Girl Long Hair about a makeover of a naturally curly woman's hair from curly to straight:

Before & After


I couldn't help but think along the lines of those earlier comments. I think her new look is nice, but in my mind it makes her look "normal." I'm not sure where that comes from. It may be that because I have natural hair I am just inherently biased. It could also be, and this is more likely, that because the majority of women (regardless of race) wear their hair straight, a woman rocking her naturally curly tresses stands out to me because it isn't the norm. Naturally curly hair also tends to be bigger than straight hair, which makes it stand out. Just like a woman with a closely cut hair cut looks more unique because the average woman doesn't have her hair cropped to less than an inch.

I guess this is the part of the post where I say: To each his/her own, we all have our own preferences, their hair isn't my hair so it shouldn't matter, etc. etc. ;-)
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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Youtube Tuesday: "Raindrops"

It is Tuesday, which means it is time for another YouTube Tuesday! Today's video I watched at work and thought it was hilarious! I showed it to my husband just now and he categorized it as "work funny" as apposed to "home funny." The distinction is that "work funny" stuff isn't that funny at home, but when you are working and are seeking any form of entertainment to break up the monotony of the work day, it is funnier. I can't really tell, because (as you will see) it's not really a video that is funny the second time you watch because you know what's coming.

Let me know, is this funny?



P.S.- I found this on BooksontheTrain's tumblr
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